Watercooler/Slowchat 2: Son of Watercooler

[Jacough]

Bottom post of the previous page:

Chick I've been seeing introduced me to this series called the 100. At first I thought it'd be some tweenage shit but God damn it's good. Marcus Kane is officially my nigga and an unkillable bad ass motherfucker

[Munchlax]

My cryptology exam was a disaster too, it took me half the time we even had to perform the Pohlig-Hellman attack on a prime order 2^5, and then I completely lost track when I had to carry out the Baby-Step-Giant-Step algorithm on prime orders 23 and 43. In the end I had less than an hour for the remaining 4/5ths of the exam.

ik had dezelfde ervaring, allemaal de schuld van die vluchtelingen, ik zeg het je

[Ricotez]

My cryptology exam was a disaster too, it took me half the time we even had to perform the Pohlig-Hellman attack on a prime order 2^5, and then I completely lost track when I had to carry out the Baby-Step-Giant-Step algorithm on prime orders 23 and 43. In the end I had less than an hour for the remaining 4/5ths of the exam.

ik had dezelfde ervaring, allemaal de schuld van die vluchtelingen, ik zeg het je

had ik maar op Geert Wilders gestemd, dan had ik me vast herinnerd hoe ik de Montgomery vorm van een Edwards curve moet berekenen

[XSI]

Wilders kan de klere krijgen, niet dat die anderen beter zijn

[Deitus]

speak american you communist bastards

[A3STH3T1CS]

no, let them continue

i wanna see where it goes

[Jacough]

Spoiler:

> this fucking minigun

Why. What good is it doing mounted on the hood of the jeep?

[Armhulen]

Spoiler:

> this fucking minigun

Why. What good is it doing mounted on the hood of the jeep?

>you have a jeep with a minigun

"EVERYONE GET OUT AND WALK"

what the fuck

[Deitus]

LE NEW PAGE, SHE IS MINE!!

[420weedscopes]

stop it or else

[A3STH3T1CS]

LE NEW PAGE, SHE IS MINE!!

is that sig for real

what kind of cuck hands out a ban like that

[Deitus]

LE NEW PAGE, SHE IS MINE!!

is that sig for real

what kind of cuck hands out a ban like that

i get a lot of 'em like that, im used to it

[Wyzack]

Whoever designed that jeep played too much spy hunter. In real life putting a gun entirely fixed to the front of a vehicle is retarded. It literally would be incapable of aiming up or down and even aiming left to right by turning the jeep would be awful. Why not just pintle mount it in the passenger seat?

[Whoisthere]

Leaving Africa was a shit idea for us, as species, because now I have to sit on my ass in a cubicle in the middle of a frozen wasteland and listen to my colleagues cough and sneeze while I deal with documents titled "summary appraisal report" because I decided to leave my fucking comfort zone and become a fucking manager for a change because hey it'd be fun to see how cubicle wage slaves live and I remember I had broken ribs and that made air go into my thoracic cavity or someshit and I couldn't move without breaking into sweat from all the pain and I had to walk a bunch of kilometers and honestly it was great and I enjoyed every moment of it apart from those moments when I thought I should've just stayed put and waited for rescue or someshit but holy hell I don't know if any of you people do office work and if you do: WHY, just WHY, WHY FUCKING WORK A CORPORATE/COMPANY PAPER-PUSHING JOB EVER, I REMEMBER NOT EATING FOR SEVERAL DAYS BECAUSE NO MONEY AND IT WAS FINE, BUT THIS SHIT SITTING IN THE OFFICE JUST FUCKING TYPING SHIT IN WORD AND YOU CAN'T EVEN BE SURE TO LEAVE AT 6 PM BECAUSE HEY HERE'S SOME URGENT SHIT YOU HAVE TO DO FUCKING WHY I'D RATHER BE HOMELESS SAC THAN THIS SHIT

[Whoisthere]

I'm leaving come March (just in time to spend the money earned over the course of spring; I look forward to all the spring-time smells and warm wind and being able to spend 2 hours having my morning coffee with French pastries). I just can't drop my responsibilities and walk out the door (though I wish I could), people depend on me. Oh well. This too shall pass. Today I have judo and a long ride home on a public commute waiting for me. I'll read a book and eat junk food on the bus and be happy until 10 AM next day.

Man life is awesome as long as you don't let yourself participate in bullshit activities.

[DemonFiren]

Martial arts are surprisingly useful at getting your mind off shit.

[Whoisthere]

Martial arts are surprisingly useful at getting your mind off shit.

Tbh I hate judo and only do it because it gives me an excuse to weeb out and wear my gi. If I could pick a sport just for fun and not for retarded benefits like IT'S SELF DEFENCE or IT'LL MAKE ME STRONGER I'd play badminton all day erry day.

Do you martial art too?

Orange juice from concentrate is what the body ordered.
I ran out of water halfway through today and having a carton of orange ready at home is a treat.

>drinking liquid diabeetus
I hope in the future you will feel guilty about juice and lose enjoyment of life as a result

[DemonFiren]

Tai chi for me.

[Screemonster]

Tai chi for me.

[DemonFiren]

okay what
no, literally what

[Screemonster]

just reminded of one of the many shitty ZX Spectrum games I got bundled on the covers of magazines as a kid

[DemonFiren]

Bastards who programmed this probably don't even know the single whip.

[Screemonster]

considering that they seem to be under the impression that tai chi involves a lot of jumping around on platforms and collecting items, you're probably right.

[Wyzack]

Orange juice is the nectar of the gods anyone who thinks otherwise is a communist

[Deitus]

Bastards who programmed this probably don't even know the single whip.

i can do the whip

[youtube]JSuQZjPl2Rw[/youtube]

[Super Aggro Crag]

Having problems with my Weiner. Keep having to pee at night. Makes it hard to fall asleep. Probably cancer.

[Malkevin]

Having problems with my Weiner. Keep having to pee at night. Makes it hard to fall asleep. Probably cancer.

Probably just a bladder infection, or maybe kidney stones.

Drink cranberry juice.

[Super Aggro Crag]

Having problems with my Weiner. Keep having to pee at night. Makes it hard to fall asleep. Probably cancer.

Probably just a bladder infection, or maybe kidney stones.

Drink cranberry juice.

I like cranberry juice but the plebes have ruined it with concentrate and cocktail and high frabjous cron sizzyurp

[420weedscopes]

i was gonna write a big thing
about how i said bad shit to a girl i like and it went as poorly as you'd expect
but now i don't think i want to

just feelin empty for the first time in a long time

[Wyzack]

Sad

I will be around later if you want to vent your frustration on some fictional characters via murder

[Super Aggro Crag]

Another rejection
Sittin here thinking about the odds of a fall from three stories killing me on impact

Not very good right?

[PKPenguin321]

Another rejection
Sittin here thinking about the odds of a fall from three stories killing me on impact

Not very good right?

Dont do it

[Super Aggro Crag]

Yeah pk I dont think I will there's too much chance of fucking up

[XSI]

Yeah, thats a bad idea

[Deitus]

Yeah pk I dont think I will there's too much chance of fucking up

we need you here, who else is gonna be able to tell us what's up?

[ShadowDimentio]

I got my wisdom teeth removed today. Had I not insisted that I get another xray scan before he started cutting me up I would only have had one removed out of the two and would have had to go back for more suffering.

Didn't feel any pain as he worked, but I could feel the force of him trying to rip the teeth out of my jaw and hear the crunching as they snapped free. It was awful, and now my mouth hurts and is full of blood.

[Deitus]

I got my wisdom teeth removed today. Had I not insisted that I get another xray scan before he started cutting me up I would only have had one removed out of the two and would have had to go back for more suffering.

Didn't feel any pain as he worked, but I could feel the force of him trying to rip the teeth out of my jaw and hear the crunching as they snapped free. It was awful, and now my mouth hurts and is full of blood.

i got mine removed years ago, and it was fucking awful. the taste of constant blood oozing from throbbing holes in my mouth was only surpassed by the taste of the gauze i kept having to put in there that just became saturated with bloody saliva and squished like a fucking sponge whenever it moved at all

you have my condolences

in other news i somehow did very well on an exam i thought i was doomed to fail, and to celebrate went home and ordered a fight stick and some books (tao te ching, the vedas, and a book on chinese mythology). took another one yesterday that i think i did eh on and i should be studying for one now that i take in a few hours that im even more doomed to fail on. m-maybe lighting will strike twice r-right?

[ShadowDimentio]

I'm actually doing fine now that I have the awful gauze out of my mouth, ate some icecream, and applied an icepack to my cheek. The bleeding has slowed down and the pain meds have kicked in, only problem is that I don't dare move my mouth much lest my wounds reopen.

[Deitus]

I'm actually doing fine now that I have the awful gauze out of my mouth, ate some icecream, and applied an icepack to my cheek. The bleeding has slowed down and the pain meds have kicked in, only problem is that I don't dare move my mouth much lest my wounds reopen.

>ate icecream

absolute fucking madman

[ShadowDimentio]

The sheet they gave me of instructions say on day 1 to eat cool soft stuff like jello, yogurt and icecream. It was nice and soft and cool and got the taste of blood out of my mouth.

[Deitus]

The sheet they gave me of instructions say on day 1 to eat cool soft stuff like jello, yogurt and icecream. It was nice and soft and cool and got the taste of blood out of my mouth.

they just told me to slap ice on it and eat, like, apple cups or something. i honestly didnt like that more than the time they put a bunch of wires on one of my canines because it was backwards and i had to live with constant dully throbbing mouth pain for over a year while they constantly readjusted so the tooth could turn 180 degrees

[420weedscopes]

got friendzoned

[tedward1337]

today marks the 2nd anniversary of my fathers passing

February sucks

[Remie Richards]

Bought strawberries the other day and still had over half a box of blueberries from last weekend.
"Hey I'm going to make pancakes."
"Alright I'll go get some lemons from the shop since we're out."
Wound up with a pancake station of toppings:

• Sugar
• Lemon
• Strawberries
• Blueberries
• Cream
• Grated chocolate

>no orange juice

you literally don't know how to pancake.

[420weedscopes]

i seem to be the only one that makes a fruit pancake as well as a meat pancake
never combined that's fucking insane

[Super Aggro Crag]

I dont like pancakes.

[Wyzack]

I generally prefer waffles but good pancakes are still awesome

[Qbopper]

I don't feel like making a thread for this but I wanted to share so here's my irl DnD game I'm playing in (it's my first time playing, and it's 4e, despite me having just bought the 5e book, wew)

My ranger's name is Roberto - his dwarven foster parents thought he was an elf (he's a half elf) and they thought Roberto was an elvish name

For context, we have "Frozone" the mage, a dragonkin who's "tits are slightly bigger than anyone else's that is near her", THAT GUY's character (he's gone though like 3 of them now because he keeps doing dumb shit and dying), the paladin who's god wants him to get into as many fights as possible, and the druid played by the french guy who takes 5 minutes to say "hey do you have any useful information on [quest] for us?". Aside from the paladin, the DM, and maybe the druid, this is everyone's first game.

We started with Keep on the Shadowfell (although I was the only one who felt we didn't do enough afterwards - we stopped the cultists from opening a portal and letting a big bad dragon out, but then promptly did nothing past killing the head cultist, taking his staff, and bailing on the portal where the dragon was still visible even though he can't get through) and are now on our way to Baldur's Gate, because no one else had any better ideas and I like video games. We're moving through a mountain range and like retards, didn't stop to rest until it was dark.

So I say "well uh, let's find a cave or something" because the area is known for having goblins and shit like that, when we hear thudding near by. I say "it's probably a giant" but the retard (THAT GUY) sends his swordmage running off into the pitch black looking for something to fight. The paladin follows, and they promptly find the giant when they run into its leg.

Someone has the sense to crack a sunrod and we start trying to unload on the giant, but it's got an absurd AC since we're like level 3. Frozone is essentially the only one who can reliably deal damage to the thing, and I say "fuck this let's run". Frozone's player is inebriated at this point (this session is his first time trying DnD, he's a known lightweight, and of course THAT GUY brings out a bottle of rum like a piece of shit) so he runs off into the dark without everyone. I give chase, considering the fact that the guy is drunk irl and likely going to do something dumb. More uninteresting shit happens and we're all taking a lot of damage, when the dragonborn with slightly-bigger-tits decides to try something absolutely retarded.

He asks the DM if he can throw the rope and have it loop around anything on the giant. Me and the paladin immediately see where he's going with this and are sort of in shock. Somehow, he actually manages to land the throw through a buckle or some shit like that I forgot, and pulls it tight. He then yanks two daggers out, and utters those fateful words.

"I want to climb the giant."

Nat 20 on the skill check, he starts stabbing his way up the leg. I'm usually an uncreative piece of shit, but this ridiculous display emboldens me, and I ask the DM if I can turn on VATS and aim for the eyes. I pop my daily to shoot two arrows, one at each eye, and let the d20 fly.

Nat 20, of course.

The giant is now blind, and blindly flailing around. Thanks to the rope and daggers, plus a healthy roll, the dragonborn manages to hold their grip on the giant's leg. Somehow, THAT GUY's swordmage manages to get killed by the giant's weapon, despite him not even making an attempt to hit any of us. The giant manages to push the arrows deeper into his eyes as he's shitting himself in terror. Somehow, the tiny group of retards have managed to turn the situation around. The giant falls as Frozone deals a nat 20 on a spell, and the party puts the boots to him (medium style).

we should be fucking dead tbh

[Wyzack]

Second Second life

[Wyzack]

Also not that i think anyone cares about tabletop stuff in the watercooler thread, but we do actually have a specific thread for it if you would rather post em there.

[XSI]

I´m pretty sure that VR thing is going to get used for porn