Pains, Traditions, and Rituals New Players Will Never Experience

[bobbahbrown]

Talking to HG inspired me to make this thread. Share your memories and experiences with the zoomers of the things they will never experience.

Some of the ones that inspired this thread:
- You will never beg for acid so you can print circuit boards and be ignored
- You will never experience the tradition of dying to a slime while handling them manually
- You will never turn a lot of your hard-earned ore into slag
- You will never scream at the AI to let you into the teleporter so you can rush bluespace research
- You will never follow a list of items to deconstruct to complete rnd in less than 10 minutes
- You will never experience the SOUL of planning your movements keypress by keypress during lagspikes
- You will NEVER enjoy stungloves
- Asteroid mining base means nothing to you

[Armhulen]

Starts off so well with the concept of a dangerous station you need to be mindful of then it goes in the shitter with "complete rnd in 10 minutes" and "asteroid mining with fucking nothing on it at all" with a little bit of "stungloves were fun r-right guys"

[bobbahbrown]

Starts off so well with the concept of a dangerous station you need to be mindful of then it goes in the shitter with "complete rnd in 10 minutes" and "asteroid mining with fucking nothing on it at all" with a little bit of "stungloves were fun r-right guys"

T R A D I T I O N

S O U L

i never said they were good things they are just things people will never experience

[Shadowflame909]

They won't experience soap stuns.

Soon they won't experience bubblegum getting on station since lavaland is gonna be a mecha anime now.

They won't experience when medical could heal as fast as antags could do damage with the one button press of a sleeper

Edit: And they don't remember when the weeping angel from Doctor Who and head-slugs where both xenobio mobs.

[NoxVS]

They will never see the glory that was experimental cloner slimepeople hiveminds.

[teepeepee]

they will never experience cerestation (rip)

[wesoda25]

I mean the easy answer is the wrath of the golden bolt

[PKPenguin321]

Starts off so well with the concept of a dangerous station you need to be mindful of then it goes in the shitter with "complete rnd in 10 minutes" and "asteroid mining with fucking nothing on it at all" with a little bit of "stungloves were fun r-right guys"

not all of the things in there are positives obviously
such as: "- You will never experience the SOUL of planning your movements keypress by keypress during lagspikes"
which actually DOES still happen, albeit not as often

[Armhulen]

yeah I kinda took the thread wrong

[Yenwodyah]

Dying to one guy with a filled paper cup and a narrow hallway
The roundstart insuls rush on meta
The joy of getting a knockdown on the first disarm
Integrated circuit memes
Being able to steal the spare without breaking a locker open
Hygiene
Drones
SCP-294
Cuck cult
Flightsuits (I still miss these)

[CDranzer]

Singuloose as the default shuttle call

[Shadowflame909]

The OG gangs gamemode

The Abductors game-mode.

The Jojo Stand Game-Mode.

[cacogen]

tiny prick and a burning sensation

unless you get a uti lol

[InsaneHyena]

I miss all things that made the station actually dangerous, such as pods launching instantly. You could very well die ten seconds in your shift as a miner, if you weren't cautious. Being spaced by a fuckstick coworker is a joy new players will never feel.

[confused rock]

like a 20% chance you'll get mannitol after you're cloned

[trollbreeder]

Waiting until you're fully cloned, constantly examining the pod to see the progress.
Stripping and putting all of your gear back on.
Seeing your own corpse.

[peoplearestrange]

You will never experience the absolute GLORY of dodging a taser shot mid flight, or even in those rare RARE moments, catching the taser shot.

Broadyquest

Knowing the certain death that will come swiftly after that parapen.

Not letting ANYONE stand less than 1 title away from you (the ORIGINAL social distancing)

You feel a tiny prick

The quiet, peaceful task of old mining, gathering resources for the station with minimal threat.

And saying that... resources being SCARCE. Like actually having to rush for metal sheets as an engineer at roundstart or moaning to cargo to get the miners to mine some.

[Tlaltecuhtli]

breaking in teleporter to get bs crystals and then fire up the telesci calculator

[Whoneedspacee]

old bubblegum and ash drake being easily round start rushable and people just spamming that loot

having to learn that hotkey mode actually exists

being clicked once and dying because of that (this is just being phased out of the game lets be honest in a year stun batons wont exist)

atmos being a relatively misunderstood thing by most players with no real GOOD guide for it (more people definitely understand atmos today than did a couple years ago)

legion cores ahealing so you could just get the die of fate roundstart

the lavaland wizard ruin that had the healing wand

the room theme lobby song

point bombs being able to research all of the techwebs basically instantly

scientific notation fusion bombs

wizard not ending when there are summon event antagonists

gygax being able to roflstomp through everything with its auto punching fists especially if you had an auto regenerating cell

lavaland being about getting gamer loot while risking your life and not about mech anime parts that do nothing on the station cant wait for lavaland removal when nobody plays it lol

clicking every button on the sleeper and calling yourself a good medical doctor

lavaland cult bases being op as shit

the war ops shuttle getting you banned for looking for it because its turrets were pea baby strong

virtual reality existing

resting not having a hud icon

no smooth movement when walking between tiles

singularity tesla engine roundstart

the round ending within 5 minutes because it wasnt dynamic gamemode

idk thats everything i could think of

[bobbahbrown]

<snip>

most of these are very recent..........

low boomer energy........

[Mickyan]

Not noticing that one of the dozen blobs of pixels on the shuttle is trying to kill you because there are no attack animations and personal attack text is not highlighted in chat

[Whoneedspacee]

<snip>

most of these are very recent..........

low boomer energy........

but urs are

- You will never beg for acid so you can print circuit boards and be ignored
- You will never experience the tradition of dying to a slime while handling them manually
- You will never turn a lot of your hard-earned ore into slag
- You will never scream at the AI to let you into the teleporter so you can rush bluespace research
- You will never follow a list of items to deconstruct to complete rnd in less than 10 minutes
- You will never experience the SOUL of planning your movements keypress by keypress during lagspikes
- You will NEVER enjoy stungloves
- Asteroid mining base means nothing to you

like half of these are post 2017 how is that boomer

[bobbahbrown]

like half of these are post 2017 how is that boomer

[Hornygranny]

>You will never get killed by a cloaker user who got all the thermals
>You will never be one hit crit by someone with a polytrinic acid spray
>You will never be stunlocked to death by screwdriver eye gouging
>You will never be instantly tabled and beaten to death
>You will never be quickchoked
>You will never be stunned for ten seconds by an electrode
>You will never be permanently welded into a locker
>You will never try and fail to contribute to code on SVN

[confused rock]

Welding down the bar backroom wall after the lizard bartender goes missing only for nuke ops to toss tear gas into the backroom and when it clears the erping lizards are gibs on the floor

[SaveVatznick]

Blob gamemode.

Flooding the station with bicycles because of the stonks bug that made cargo print more money than the Fed.

Deciding they're tired of the Wizard and hucking a cheap IED lance to reset the round.

Massive Clock Cult assaults on the Clock dimension.

Making a poisonous lime in Botany that can do 1500+damage and crits in 10 seconds.

Fernet Cola.

A world without Lexia Black.

[Jack7D1]

Bee man thinks that whoneedspace is new.

[EagleWiz]

Wondering why half the station is wearing masks right before a floating shadow monster explodes you with his mind

bring back shadowling

[Lumbermancer]

You will never experience 100% human crew.

[Cobby]

cult being completed in 5 minutes as well as having a button that instagibs people who can view the rune :woozy:

Pacid borg murderbone

[Lumbermancer]

You will never experience crafting polytrinic acid spacelube smoke grenade, and giving it to clown saying it's just lube.
You will never stealthily murder 20 people using parasteng.

[Karp]

Old clunky fireball that only fired in one direction and couldn't be aimed

Casting Ei Nath/parasting/deathsting when there's only one person adjacent to you to avoid the god awful prompt box for selecting who wanted to gib/sting

People not sharing their cult research words SHARE IT YOU FUCKING CUNT I DONT WANNA WASTE 10+ MINUTES RESEARCHING BASIC WORDS WHEN YOUR SHARED WORDS CAN CUT DOWN RESEARCH TIME TO 5 MINUTES MAX

The joys of old ninja 100% true invis, ninja telegibbing, ninjamov, and unlocking kamikaze mode which gave you a new teleport that teleports behind someone and gibs them

The cancer of being able to produce a fuckload of lockboxless energy revolvers less than 30 seconds into the round

I wasn't old enough for metroids/roros but I remember needing to do scalpel/circular saw surgery on every individual slime to extract their slime core, which was awful once you had a few dozen slime corpses due to the sheer volume of time you spent doing surgery

bunch of other stuff I can't think about right now but despite all the jankiness/clunkiness, I still miss some of it tbh

[trollbreeder]

Giving a 40u nitric acid patch to the clown disguised as 9u of meth. Before the nitric nerf.

Spoiler:

"Cleans, this isn't meth...", the clown said, with a horrifying realization in his eyes. The lizard stared directly at the clown, on the outside having the same neutral look as he always does, being unable to express emotions with his maw, but on the inside, he was maniacally cackling until he was deaf.
The clown collapsed as his flesh melted, yelling for help. "Help, medbay!". He looked upon the clown, and thought he punished him good, for the clown was a shitter, atleast according to the CMO.
He was just a cog in the machine, after all, and disobeying orders could get him punished, but he regretted his decisions as soon as he saw the person underneath the mask. "I'm sssorry."

[Lumbermancer]

You will never buy six monkey cube crates and research all the cult words camping on the cargo shuttle.

[Lumbermancer]

You will never experience the joy of the whole station playing maths trivia using NTSL.

[Lumbermancer]

You will never put on a firesuit, drink some coffee, and jump out of an external airlock for a spacewalk.

Actually no pains or traditions or rituals come to my mind...I guess you only remember the good things...

[InsaneHyena]

Secborgs on Robocop lawset just going around station killing people with impunity, because no one carries flashes

[Reece1995]

They will never have the FUN and DYNAMIC challenge of fighting a security cyborg with just a crowbar.

[Karp]

You will never experience the joy of the whole station playing maths trivia using NTSL.

It was fun at first but I eventually ended up hating that shit along with flamboyantly annoying text/mute/INCREDIBLY LARGE TEXT size scripts with a burning passion and I have on multiple occasions broken into the telecomms sat roundstart whenever I saw a player who would do that to assault them/destroy the ntsl console before they can install their shitty script and ruin the round

[Lumbermancer]

But you could do fun traitor shit too, like filtering people out, including yourself and your victims. I didn't do much with it, except load the scripts from the wiki like YARR, but it was fun.

[bobbahbrown]

you will NEVER put a cult teleport rune on the cargo shuttle to raid centcomm

[Lumbermancer]

You will never abuse telescience using calculator some nerd coded.

[Karp]

But you could do fun traitor shit too, like filtering people out, including yourself and your victims. I didn't do much with it, except load the scripts from the wiki like YARR, but it was fun.

True that, that stuff was fun but it was just the obnoxious meme scripts with giant rainbow text that got annoying, especially when it was the same player who kept installing it round after round for weeks. I'm a fan of how obnoxious and spammy it could get tbh. Though the best part of ntsl was being malf and individually muting people with a tcomms script to murder them while nobody knows what the fuck is going on because the victim was completely silent over radio.

tbh I also kinda miss the older iterations of hulk, not because they were balanced but because they were insanely broken and funny. They went from being able to use guns and tk punch people through walls to having the hilarious stun punch wombo comboing(I think aliens still got stun punched by hulks for a long fucking time because xenos had snowflake life code, I remember post rework a naked hulk with just a biohazard helmet destroying a big xeno nest by punching all the xenos to death very slowly) into now just piercing armor. Kinda tragic how the mighty hulk has fallen.

A classic was the horrific lag the game had and being forced to alt click tiles instead of right clicking them to avoid right click lag. Was always funny when a traitor stunned you and right clicked your tile which crashed their game and let you kill them.

[BeeSting12]

it's insane to me that new players will only ever see the singularity as the effect of the supermatter engine going boom.

[nsos]

connecting from ss13.eu

[Man_Shroom]

All the old library porn

Efficiencystation, Ministation, Asteroidstation

Irc chat

Gang mode, Shadowlings, clock cult, old blobmode

Human only stations

[BeeSting12]

Man I about forgot about ass and efficiency. Birdboat is where it's at though.

Broadyquest

Broadyquest was quite possibly the funniest thing i ever saw playing ss13

[cacogen]

>going to the tcomms satellite as rd to collect ansibles and other telecomms bullshit no one understands to deconstruct
>having to stand a tile away from everyone to avoid getting stun gloved or parastung
>lack of hotkeys as borg for doors and things
>all radio frequencies being the same colour
>not being able to alt+click containers in your bag to view their contents
>gibbing not dropping a brain completely ending your round
>no ghost roles aside from pAI and whatever else I'm forgetting so everyone had to sit out
>dante smith and a few other people's rampant murderbones killing the entire station everytime they got antag
>red medbay
>sleeper consoles
>WGW every round
>killing Ian being punishable by death
>ban he
>the singularity, also known as the most fun engine
>bag of holding singularities to the point where three or four singularities ravage the station
>20 second stuns from electrodes and stun batons
>classic baton (detective's truncheon thing, found on the derelict) being the same stun length as the stun baton but needing no charging
>taser energy guns
>validhunting sec borgs disobeying their laws to arrest criminals and using harm intent to make themselves immovable to box them in
>darkness not actually being dark/the lighting system being shit
>metroids and then briefly roros
>hop having the security channel on their headset and access to security
>chloral being an instant knockout at 5u with the hypospray and death at 20-25u, and being able to go through hardsuits and other exosuits
>emergency oxygen tanks coming partially filled
>having a chance to knock people out with the lawyer's briefcase
>viruses spreading from bodily fluid stains on the floor
>only four genetics powers and having to arduously irradiate blocks to be above a certain threshhold for a chance for powers to activate
>robotics being by engineering
>ai malf sat in the middle of space on a different z-level while a decoy ai spawns in the chamber roundstart which causes a huge explosion without any warning when carded
>jane-luc price
>being the only player reporting issues on the GitHub issue tracker
>xenoburgers and roburgers
>being able to slam page down repeatedly to quickchoke someone
>non-randomised space (i.e. same layout between rounds)
>space that always transitions randomly
>sex reassignment surgery and people being kidnapped to have it performed on them against their will
>revs starting with three heads and actually having a decent chance of winning
>all new players being bald white men with black eyes
>all assistants having grey jumpsuits
>20 second crit
>no circle in the middle of the black when unconscious to see what's happening

[Thunder11]

You will never use old TK to look through a camera console and toolbox someone on the other side of the station

[Tlaltecuhtli]

a

>sex reassignment surgery and people being kidnapped to have it performed on them against their will

still possible, you can use dna machine to edit hair/skin/eye color and gender