/tg/Station 13

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 2:28 am**

Bottom post of the previous page:

Spamming mutagen is a valid strategy

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 2:31 am**

Deitus wrote:technically these went in my favor but goddamn if this guy doesnt piss me off

>in hydro
>were early calls of cult but were quickly disproved with mime having a stando
>shitface mcscientist comes up
>breaks into hydro through window
>"WENEEDHOLYMELONSTODEALWITHTHECULT"
>dude its not even cult, get out
>"WHAT ARE YOU CULT?!!"
>no, there is no cult
>"THEN WHY WONT YOU MAKE MELONS YOU'RE CULT"
>starts attacking me
>slip n' cuffs
>toss him down disposals while he screams over comms about how i'm "FOR SURE CULT SEC TO HYDRO"

different round

>spend another round chillin in hydro
>get chem access for some dank mutagen
>shitface mcscientist at the door yelling at chemists that he needs mutagen
>chemist gives him a large beakerful while i make a bunch of bottles of it myself
>NOT EVEN 20 seconds later he's back and asking for more
>chemist is confused but gives it to him
>again, literally not even 20 seconds later and he's back with the empty beaker asking for more
>chemist is getting pissed
>i leave with my chem bag full of mutagen bottles and head over to hydro while chemist gives another refill
>as i set up here comes shitface mcscientist charging in
>rapid-fire dumps the entire beaker on one ambrosia
>like not even pausing AT ALL
>spots my stack of mutagen and starts grabbing a bunch to dump
>dude you're not even doing it right, get your own mutagen
>"I NEED IT FOR AMBROSIA FUCK OFF"
>continues taking my mutagen
>slip n' cuffs
>start to warn him again not to take my shit
>"JONATHAN TALIST KIDNAPPING ME HYDRO SEC TO HYDRO"
>if you take my shit again you're going down disposals
>uncuff
>shoves me and takes more mutagen to dump
>slip n' cuffs
>disposals
>"JONATHAN TALIST IS FOR SURE ANTAG SEC TO HYDRO"
>flussssh
>start making shit in peace
>oh boy he's back
>wordlessly whips out an egun and starts trying to lethal me
>his aim sucks
>slip n' cuff
>tired of your shit
>"SEC TO HYDRO JONATHAN TALIST IS LING KILLING ME"
>damn straight im gonna kill you
>drag him out to secluded maint and welder his ass dead
>strip and hide body in separate location
>go back to work in peace

i wont say the name of the guy but he's only appeared within the last few days and he's constantly pulling stupidass shit and immediately cries out "antag" over comms if he doesnt get his way. needless to say he has earned a spot at the tippy top of my shitter list in record time.

how old do you estimate he is

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 10:50 am**

Spamming mutagen doesn't work. They made it so that gaia can now mutate back into deus. Also, if he was really using so much, he was probably using 10u at a time instead of 5u because newer players don't know that using a container in your hand changes the transfer amount. Also all that ick in ooc hurts.

Besides, after all the botany nerfs, it takes too long to get any decent holy water production going.

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 12:26 pm**

huehuehue wrote:
Deitus wrote:*snip*
i wont say the name of the guy but he's only appeared within the last few days and he's constantly pulling stupidass shit and immediately cries out "antag" over comms if he doesnt get his way. needless to say he has earned a spot at the tippy top of my shitter list in record time.
how old do you estimate he is

If he is actually using the word "antag" outside of OOC then he may need a serious talking to.

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 12:33 pm**

Dr_bee wrote:
huehuehue wrote:
Deitus wrote:*snip*
i wont say the name of the guy but he's only appeared within the last few days and he's constantly pulling stupidass shit and immediately cries out "antag" over comms if he doesnt get his way. needless to say he has earned a spot at the tippy top of my shitter list in record time.
how old do you estimate he is
If he is actually using the word "antag" outside of OOC then he may need a serious talking to.

gee, you think

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 9:43 pm**

I have a couple of specific stories but they all suck

ever since I became an admin

literally

EVERY

round I try to deadmin and play normally I get insta fucked by conversion or something

I'm unrobust so half the time it's my fault which just makes me sigh, but the other half it's entirely out of my control (eg. lagspikes) and it makes me so fuckin' mad

when I wasn't admin for that month or two this NEVER happened

armhulenn can confirm that this isn't just salt, it happens EVERY TIME

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 9:52 pm**

Qbopper wrote:I have a couple of specific stories but they all suck

ever since I became an admin

literally

EVERY

round I try to deadmin and play normally I get insta fucked by conversion or something

I'm unrobust so half the time it's my fault which just makes me sigh, but the other half it's entirely out of my control (eg. lagspikes) and it makes me so fuckin' mad

when I wasn't admin for that month or two this NEVER happened

armhulenn can confirm that this isn't just salt, it happens EVERY TIME

That's how they get'cha buddy. The less you enjoy playing you less you play and the more you have to admin if you want to fuel your SS13 addiction!

Posted: **Tue Oct 17, 2017 10:59 pm**

It's very tragic

Posted: **Wed Oct 18, 2017 3:41 am**

Finally get to do traitor sci. Make some maxcaps, head to medbay for cloning. A miner who will be unnamed, but who only plays the game when he gets to be traitor and otherwise just goes afk or does his job far less than minimum effort if he doesnt, asks if I have some bombs for mining. I say yeah, hand him one because I'm not not allowed to metagame the fact he's a total shitbag who does the above things. Head to mining with him to see the bomb and how good it is anway, get murdered on the shuttle while saying codewords to possibly stop him from murdering me.

Yes I mad.

You only get 3 guesses who.

Spoiler:

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 12:59 pm**

>After many attempts, finally manage to make rainbow slimes again
>People are swarming xenobiology for green slime cores so they can un-transform after a changeling transformed them
>They all happen to leave as someone attacks xenobiology from space
>They take out all the windows and cryosting me a gorillion times
>I scream repeatedly over the radio "XENOBIOLOGY UNDER ATTACK, CHANGELING ATTACKING XENOBIOLOGY"
>John Mooney and Kai Greenwood to the rescue!
>They step over my body and start using green slime cores to roll random golem types.
>What.
>They have barely any idea what they're doing.
>They kill my rainbow slimes.
>Fifteen minutes or so in, after much bungling, including DRAWING BLOOD OUT OF MY BODY, they fuck off.
>Never got to use gold or adamantium slimes, let alone rainbow ones.

Bonus.
>Since I'm not being cloned, decide to roll for swarmer.
>Eat up a bunch of materials, make a second swarmer. Shell filled straight away.
>Other swarmer immediately smacks me.

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 1:06 pm**

Hathkar wrote:Finally get to do traitor sci. Make some maxcaps, head to medbay for cloning. A miner who will be unnamed, but who only plays the game when he gets to be traitor and otherwise just goes afk or does his job far less than minimum effort if he doesnt, asks if I have some bombs for mining. I say yeah, hand him one because I'm not not allowed to metagame the fact he's a total shitbag who does the above things. Head to mining with him to see the bomb and how good it is anway, get murdered on the shuttle while saying codewords to possibly stop him from murdering me.

Yes I mad.

You only get 3 guesses who.
Spoiler:
They only play scientist, virologist, geneticist, and sometimes miner. They are also known for being a boring murderboner antag, commonly making deadly viruses, hulking out, and maxcap bombing the station. Typically does 2-3 of the above in a round.

But I thought Klara got the bannu.

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 1:41 pm**

darkpaladin109 wrote:
Hathkar wrote:Finally get to do traitor sci. Make some maxcaps, head to medbay for cloning. A miner who will be unnamed, but who only plays the game when he gets to be traitor and otherwise just goes afk or does his job far less than minimum effort if he doesnt, asks if I have some bombs for mining. I say yeah, hand him one because I'm not not allowed to metagame the fact he's a total shitbag who does the above things. Head to mining with him to see the bomb and how good it is anway, get murdered on the shuttle while saying codewords to possibly stop him from murdering me.

Yes I mad.

You only get 3 guesses who.
Spoiler:
They only play scientist, virologist, geneticist, and sometimes miner. They are also known for being a boring murderboner antag, commonly making deadly viruses, hulking out, and maxcap bombing the station. Typically does 2-3 of the above in a round.
But I thought Klara got the bannu.

My guess is Gene Ball. You can metagrudge as a traitor anyway as long as you don't roll antag solely to fuck with that one guy

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 2:38 pm**

gene ball is a fucking king and a quality player

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 2:49 pm**

bman wrote:gene ball is a fucking king and a quality player

Gene Ball is the kind of player who will metagrudge you because he doesn't like your name.

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 2:54 pm**

AnonymousNow wrote:
bman wrote:gene ball is a fucking king and a quality player
Gene Ball is the kind of player who will metagrudge you because he doesn't like your name.

exactly, what kind of fucking god-tier madman does that shit?

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:00 pm**

bman wrote:
AnonymousNow wrote:
bman wrote:gene ball is a fucking king and a quality player
Gene Ball is the kind of player who will metagrudge you because he doesn't like your name.
exactly, what kind of fucking god-tier madman does that shit?

obviously Gene Ball

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:07 pm**

in fact, the big man himself is right here right now jacking off to the fruits of his labor

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:08 pm**

huehuehue wrote:
bman wrote:
AnonymousNow wrote:
bman wrote:gene ball is a fucking king and a quality player
Gene Ball is the kind of player who will metagrudge you because he doesn't like your name.
exactly, what kind of fucking god-tier madman does that shit?
obviously Gene Ball

It's okay Corn Cobb. You and Suki are actually my two favorite players because you're always peaceful and nice.

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:12 pm**

Metafriending confirmed, sorry kid gotta ban u

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:14 pm**

I think the person has to like you back for it to be a friendship.

Cobb wouldn't even help me figure out if I actually had a hernia after he said I was walking like I did.
WHAT KIND OF DOCTOR ARE YOU!

Also dang it Hathkar, how dare you leave out my bullshit with disposals. Or the fact that my objectives for the round were "Kill you, escape alive."

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:15 pm**

theyre probably just tsundere

Posted: **Wed Nov 01, 2017 4:15 pm**

BeeSting12 wrote:theyre probably just tsundere

b-b-baka

Posted: **Thu Nov 02, 2017 7:22 am**

>HoP
>Tator tot hoo boy
>Embrace my newfound murder abilities by lasering a disarm-happy assistant into crit in my line
>AI asks me to secure the disk since there's no captain.
>Secure the disk, the spare, and also my objective, the captain's jetpack.
>My ridiculously easy steal objective complete, an idea for a gimmick hits me
>Buy a support holoparasite
>Announce my intentions to be the BEST MEDIC EVER to the crew
>Wander around and order my stand to heal random chumps
>Meteor event.jpg
>Check crew monitor, somebody's already gotten fucked up in science
>Happy to finally be able to tend to something more severe than mere scrapes and bruises I book it over to science
>Literally a second after stepping foot into science a meteor flies down the middle of the hallway and pulverizes me, killing both me and my holoparasite instantly
>Fucking MLG 360 noscoped by RNG

Posted: **Thu Nov 02, 2017 3:46 pm**

>set janitor to high and everything else to low
>get set as HoS anyways
>barely any sec other than me
>walk around a bit looking for val- I mean criminals
>ai tells me there's a break in to the captain's office
>run down there and ai lets me in
>nobody there
>guy comes back in
>i am not robust
>disarms my taser and tases me with him
>i have two guns bitch
>get back up and disabler him
>cuff him
>manage to miss ctrl clicking him to pull because i apparantly have parkensons or something
>hop opens door and he gets up and runs around the bridge for way too long because i am garbage
>finally bring him to brig
>since he's broken in twice and also broken into the teleporter room i perma him
>ai gets bitchy
>turns out ai let him in both times to the office
>he's a nonhuman
>entire station bitches and moans for a trial
>the trial is horribly boring
>ai lets him go free

security is pain

Posted: **Thu Nov 02, 2017 3:50 pm**

Shoulda just killed him if he was non human t b h

Posted: **Thu Nov 02, 2017 4:15 pm**

Last time someone tried to put me on trial as the only officer I kicked them in the ribs tbh trials are stupid

Posted: **Fri Nov 03, 2017 1:40 am**

>be traitor clown
>get good idea
>make a secret base in maintence, leave tools scattered around to escape it, like Saw
>plan to set up teleporter to stun people and teleport them in
>steal beacon
>leave it inside
>get bounced radios
>leave one inside
>make glass observation window
>seal all exits
>leave one false wall
>steal hand tele
>hack open teleporter room, set target to my beacon
>use tc to buy an ebow and a radio jammer
>find victim
>silence radios
>hit with ebow
>cuff and full strip teleport to saw course
>run back
>"hello I want to play a game"
>they got crit by the ebow and died
>leave corpse for decoration
>find another player
>do the same thing
>"hello I want to play a game"
>they escape
>go to recuff them and release them
>handcuff myself because "lol clown memes"
>victim is still in awe over the whole thing and lets me take them off
>offer them to work as an assistant for me and make it even better
>suddenly, it's escapes-the-shuttle, traitor with a mech
>get killed along with my new assistant
>lol!

Posted: **Fri Nov 03, 2017 1:45 am**

Try disposal pipes so that they can't take the portal back out.
The shield walls out of the teleporter room so they can't just break down the wall.

I personally want to try a "two people have entered when one remains you may leave" pit, but.

It requires you to robust a bunch of people, set up a base, and players to slightly antag. Good luck one of us will pull it off one day.

Posted: **Fri Nov 03, 2017 1:50 am**

>war ops
>a bunch of r*tards build blockades in the bridge
>disk is on some ligger
>ops blow up bridge and noone can get out because of blockades
>miraculously me and the ligger live
>totally blocked in
>we get bombed again
>this time we die because people are dumb

Posted: **Fri Nov 03, 2017 6:50 am**

at least noone got out

Posted: **Mon Nov 13, 2017 6:23 am**

>be sec officer
>HoS and AI are at odds over executions
>HoS decides to kill AI, busts way into AI SAT with a bunch of other officers
>head over in hard suit, get in just in time to see HoS plant a fucking syndicate bomb on the AI SAT
>Confused but still following orders
>All sec officers leave except for one WHO TAKES THE FUCKING BOMB WITH HIM INTO SPACE
>See the obvious disobeying of orders, attempt to go after him
>Stun him, get bomb back with 30 seconds on the clock
>Head back towards SAT but voice in my head tells me it's all a bad idea
>End up getting stunned with bomb heading towards SAT by officer I stunned earlier
>have to get up quickly to bring bomb back into space
>get killed

Posted: **Tue Nov 14, 2017 2:39 pm**

Being given IC orders to break OOC rules (namely, don't kill asimov silicons for trying to follow their laws and impede the HoS's murderboner) is never a fun situation to be in.

Posted: **Tue Nov 14, 2017 6:47 pm**

>latejoin sec
>fresh off the shuttle, didn't even grab sechuds
>"help arrivals"
>search arrivals, find Snake Plissken surrounded by corpses
>whip out taser, snek deflec
>whip out baton, stun, drag to brig
>Snek: "I'm actually an undercover warden disguised as asstant!"
>wat
>his PDA is colored as asstant PDA but correctly states Warden, ID also checks out
>maybe he got promoted from asstant and got carp from a traitor? very farfetched, but eh, presumption of innocence
>the other sec officer present doesn't say anything so I assume Snek is telling the truth after all
>fuck around, shuttle is called
>bump into a freshly cloned officer in medbay
>"Snek is traitor eh killed me arrest pls!"
>Okay?
>arrest Snek again 99% sure he is a traitor or a ling but don't really have enough proof to 100% convince myself
>let him go again
>finally decide to check sec records
>there's an assistant Snake Plissken
>and a warden Snake Plisskin or something to that extent
>feel like Sherlock Poirot and Dr Maigret
>go to escape to arrest Snek and gloat
>bomb explodes we both die

Posted: **Tue Nov 14, 2017 6:55 pm**

In retrospect there were so many obvious signs he really was a traitor (a dude with a sleeping carp standing among gibs and saying im innocent) but I was drunk and he had a loyalty implant. Plus I hate accidentally arresting/killing innocents.

Posted: **Tue Nov 14, 2017 6:55 pm**

Whoisthere wrote:...
>feel like Sherlock Poirot and Dr Maigret

Turns out you were more like Inspector Clouseau

Posted: **Wed Nov 15, 2017 1:16 pm**

>rogue hos (traitor pretending to be him)
>killed literally 90% of the station
>projectile immune
>he sees me
>doesnt know I stole krav maga gloves from the dead warden
>sprints down the hallway after me
>I'm blaring the fist of the north star theme
>it's time
>legsweep his ass
>whip out gun I've been carrying around
>blast him a couple times
>he has adrenals
>run away
>I'm gonna wait for him around a corner and then drop his ass again
>round corner
>>>>>>>>>the clown put banana peels all over the fuckin floor
>slip
>get stunned and cuffed

fucking clown

Posted: **Wed Nov 15, 2017 2:50 pm**

Screemonster wrote: Turns out you were more like Inspector Clouseau

Clouseau is the original "how do i change hands???" SS13 detective.

Posted: **Thu Nov 16, 2017 2:53 am**

really really shitty night for spacestation tonight

>be botany
>decide to help out sec and make some weapon plants for them
>tell the cap and hos about it
>they're on board
>make bomb tomatoes by the hundreds
>greytide starts trying to break in
>SEC TO BOTANY SEC TO BOTANY
>no response
>they get in
>fight them off but they steal a few tomatoes
>cause shit because lmao greytide
>hos comes by and ignites the entire stack of them
>blows a hole in hydro
>"they were dangerous"
>get super pissed and go after him
>he kills me then laughs at my corpse

>few rounds later
>tator botanist
>go grab some gloves to hack machines with
>come back and pray for chem machine tc trade
>"ok workin on it"
>sec officer comes by, points at me, calls me a professional failure then runs away
>ok
>waiting waiting waiting
>same sec officer and another one come by again
>arrest me for "suspicious activity"
>cant figure out how to get out, have to have chef let them out
>keep bumping into me and having to regrab me, could run easily but just want this farce over with
>some rando geneticist grabs me and saxxes
>takes me to medbay room
>"i got you fam"
>*unzips armblade*
>decapitates me as sec walks in
>sec runs off to get the ling
>cmo picks up my head
>walks right past cloning
>throws me on robotics desk
>put in mmi
>"just clone me man"
>roboticist takes my brain out of the mmi and spaces it

lessons learned, from now on anything i make, whether botany, rnd, or any other job, is solely and exclusively for my use and my use only. trying to help others in this game leads to a healthy assfucking way more often than not, and im pretty damn tired of it.

needless to say, im tilted as fuck.

Posted: **Thu Nov 16, 2017 5:18 am**

Deitus wrote:really really shitty night for spacestation tonight

>be botany
>decide to help out sec and make some weapon plants for them
>tell the cap and hos about it
>they're on board
>make bomb tomatoes by the hundreds
>greytide starts trying to break in
>SEC TO BOTANY SEC TO BOTANY
>no response
>they get in
>fight them off but they steal a few tomatoes
>cause shit because lmao greytide
>hos comes by and ignites the entire stack of them
>blows a hole in hydro
>"they were dangerous"
>get super pissed and go after him
>he kills me then laughs at my corpse

>few rounds later
>tator botanist
>go grab some gloves to hack machines with
>come back and pray for chem machine tc trade
>"ok workin on it"
>sec officer comes by, points at me, calls me a professional failure then runs away
>ok
>waiting waiting waiting
>same sec officer and another one come by again
>arrest me for "suspicious activity"
>cant figure out how to get out, have to have chef let them out
>keep bumping into me and having to regrab me, could run easily but just want this farce over with
>some rando geneticist grabs me and saxxes
>takes me to medbay room
>"i got you fam"
>*unzips armblade*
>decapitates me as sec walks in
>sec runs off to get the ling
>cmo picks up my head
>walks right past cloning
>throws me on robotics desk
>put in mmi
>"just clone me man"
>roboticist takes my brain out of the mmi and spaces it

lessons learned, from now on anything i make, whether botany, rnd, or any other job, is solely and exclusively for my use and my use only. trying to help others in this game leads to a healthy assfucking way more often than not, and im pretty damn tired of it.

needless to say, im tilted as fuck.

either those were some shitty ass players that require bannu, you're being targeted because you're infamous, or you're being targeted for lulz
either way, you'll wanna contact an admin for this, that's hippie-nox tier bullshittery

Posted: **Thu Nov 16, 2017 6:55 pm**

huehuehue wrote: either those were some shitty ass players that require bannu, you're being targeted because you're infamous, or you're being targeted for lulz
either way, you'll wanna contact an admin for this, that's hippie-nox tier bullshittery

ruled as ic issues.

also ive only been playing here a few years, im still "literally who"-tier. i doubt people would remember me enough to come after me for it.

Posted: **Thu Nov 16, 2017 7:22 pm**

You say that, but I consider you one of the more notable ones. Maybe it's just because you're one of the players who is willing to do head rolls, and at some point you had that stupid gib the pussi thing.

Posted: **Thu Nov 16, 2017 7:25 pm**

ye i grudge the shit out of talist what are you talking about

Posted: **Thu Nov 16, 2017 7:51 pm**

Deitus wrote:
huehuehue wrote: either those were some shitty ass players that require bannu, you're being targeted because you're infamous, or you're being targeted for lulz
either way, you'll wanna contact an admin for this, that's hippie-nox tier bullshittery
ruled as ic issues.

I wonder about the context for some of these that don't come out in the salt-venting process this thread is meant for but on the facts presented the second case just sounds awful. There's almost no good reasons for a roboticist to be spacing brains brought to them.

Posted: **Thu Nov 16, 2017 11:03 pm**

Deitus wrote:really really shitty night for spacestation tonight

>be botany
>decide to help out sec and make some weapon plants for them
>tell the cap and hos about it
>they're on board
>make bomb tomatoes by the hundreds
>greytide starts trying to break in
>SEC TO BOTANY SEC TO BOTANY
>no response
>they get in
>fight them off but they steal a few tomatoes
>cause shit because lmao greytide
>hos comes by and ignites the entire stack of them
>blows a hole in hydro
>"they were dangerous"
>get super pissed and go after him
>he kills me then laughs at my corpse

>few rounds later
>tator botanist
>go grab some gloves to hack machines with
>come back and pray for chem machine tc trade
>"ok workin on it"
>sec officer comes by, points at me, calls me a professional failure then runs away
>ok
>waiting waiting waiting
>same sec officer and another one come by again
>arrest me for "suspicious activity"
>cant figure out how to get out, have to have chef let them out
>keep bumping into me and having to regrab me, could run easily but just want this farce over with
>some rando geneticist grabs me and saxxes
>takes me to medbay room
>"i got you fam"
>*unzips armblade*
>decapitates me as sec walks in
>sec runs off to get the ling
>cmo picks up my head
>walks right past cloning
>throws me on robotics desk
>put in mmi
>"just clone me man"
>roboticist takes my brain out of the mmi and spaces it

lessons learned, from now on anything i make, whether botany, rnd, or any other job, is solely and exclusively for my use and my use only. trying to help others in this game leads to a healthy assfucking way more often than not, and im pretty damn tired of it.

needless to say, im tilted as fuck.

Deitus, why would you ever let security players know that you're making weapons? They get really jealous when their little dick lasers n' tasers are outmatched and are bound to grief you.

Posted: **Sun Nov 19, 2017 10:36 pm**

>Be ling again
>Yes again
> No i'm never going to win ling
> But i'll be damned if i stop trying.
>get genomes
>Kill detective
>steal captain medal
> escape as detective with ID
>oh boy how am i gonna fuck this up?
>Talk with ling buddies
>they're not interested in cooperating, mostly doing their own stuff
>sure whatever, they don't bother me i don't bother them
> run around for a bit, get my genomes
> easiest objective, not very interesting.
> find dead sec officer in maint
>absorb him
>take his shit
>no one suspects a thing
> wonder the station a bit
>find detective
>it's time
> taser
>mute sting him
>kill him with arm blade
>drag into maint
>absorb his body
>take his shit
> transform into him
> no one saw a thing
>round goes smoothly
> shuttles calls
>station going to shit
> business as usual
>shuttle arrives
> everyone piles in
> people on the shuttle surprisingly calm
>clown trips a few people with banana peels but that's the worst of it
>shuttle docks at centcom
>oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy
> did i do it? did i finally do it?
>forgot captain medal
>FUCK

Posted: **Mon Nov 20, 2017 10:29 am**

it's good to see deitus finally getting fucked like he deserves

Posted: **Mon Nov 20, 2017 4:05 pm**

>Come back after a few months hiatus
>Wasn't conscripted after all
>Yet
>You're a LAWYER TRAITOR
>Oh shit, a lot of things are different now
>Okay, what do I do?
>I'll just buy a revolver, print a shitload of ammo and shoot my target
>And then whoever I feel like
>Do exactly that
>Hack autolathe
>No option to print .357 ammo
>Doublecheck the wiki, maybe I fucked up
>Nah, everything is right
>Adminhelp - did they change the hacking?
>An admin says yes, but he doesn't know how
>Go to github, research the issue
>Apparently, it has something to do with RnD rework
>Fine
>Go back to the game
>Somehow my character hasn't been murdered or stripped yet
>Find a HoS just standing in the hallway
>Some masked chucklefuck steals his ID and backpack
>Ask him if he's my target
>Upon hearing the name, he runs off
>That's probably him
>Chase him down to the chapel
>Double tap
>Pull the body away, strip search
>Fuck, it isn't him.
>Wild security officer appears
>Just stares at me and the bloodied corpse
>I pull my gun first
>Bang, bang
>Oh right, he has armor.
>Bang
>Bang, just to be sure
>Strip search him, take his weapons, space both bodies
>Spend the rest of the round searching for my target, amidst the rumors of a rogue AI and homicidal cyborgs
>Can't find him
>Decide to kill the captain out of boredom
>Doesn't work out
>Go to the shuttle
>A hacked secborg is killing everyone with lasers, and nobody cares enough to stop him
>I don't care either
>Instead, gonna kill some ligger who's trying to start a plasmafire in the shuttle
>Succeed, get killed by the cyborg right after
>Along with everyone else
>Redtext
>My target was a changeling all along
>Shapeshifted five minutes into the shift

Wasn't that bad, actually.

Posted: **Mon Nov 20, 2017 5:37 pm**

wait they brought secborgs back?

Posted: **Fri Nov 24, 2017 5:04 am**

oranges wrote:it's good to see deitus finally getting fucked like he deserves

Posted: **Fri Nov 24, 2017 5:40 am**

Deitus wrote:
oranges wrote:it's good to see deitus finally getting fucked like he deserves

i cri evrytim

Posted: **Sun Dec 03, 2017 1:42 am**

>be me, greyshirt
>you are the tator
>kill fuckface mcgee the medical doctor and escape alive
>sweet haven't got antag in forever
>decide to buy a surplus crate
>get like four pairs of no slips and some useless pistol ammo
>and four parapens
>decide to be a pen salesman
>go to hop
>offer to give him a pen
>say it kills you instantly
>pull it out
>he explodes for some reason
>ohokay.jpg
>some time later
>hop disables me and lasers me to death for no raisin
>die

giving the hop an energy gun was a mistake

/tg/Station 13

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