/tg/Station 13

Bottom post of the previous page:

A ghost isn't a admin, you should have definitely have checked it out. Lings have been reprimanded for destroying other lings before (but mostly in such a case of not communicating and then killing & draining other lings of fluids)

FantasticFwoosh wrote:A ghost isn't a admin, you should have definitely have checked it out. Lings have been reprimanded for destroying other lings before (but mostly in such a case of not communicating and then killing & draining other lings of fluids)

I'm not aware of any such precedent. Rule 4 certainly applies without a specific exception or headmin ruling. Changelings are a team only in the sense that traitors who buy syndicate communication keys are a team or traitors with a traitor AI who buy a binary key are a team. Its intentional that lings cannot perfectly trust other lings.

I'd rule out the xenobio ling unless the round was an hour in. Also i'm pretty sure ling team objectives are either removed or disabled, so you should probably limit hivemind communication to stuff that doesn't give you away, although i think that there aren't many lings out there who report others to security.

I've dropped bombs on lings who think being a supercop is a good way to play bloodthirsty gene monster before

>brigged because I stabbed people with a carrot (fair enough)
>pink catgirl warden wordlessly drags me off to a cell on the far left after hearing the crime (all cells have blast doors for no reason)
>warden immediately tries to lung punch me
>accidentally punches themself in the face
>other sec officer watching
>ward proceeds to lunch punch me and neck chop me
>tries to harmbaton me
>accidentally harmbatons themself second hit
>proceeds to harmbaton me 4 more times
>10 minutes
>they hadn't even interacted with me the whole round
>they accidentally left their riot shield they were carrying in the cell
>put it on my back
>they flash and go back in for it
>get up and disarm them
>beat the fuck outta them
>heroic sec officer with hair protruding through his helmet saves the innocent kawaii pink haired catgirl waifu using an energy gun
>set to lethal
>nobody has any problem with my body being left to rot in the brig morgue
why live

You should have done your time and killed that warden afterwards.

Reminded me of a shit warden that kept lung punching me for 4 minutes and tried to throw me out the brig without giving me my PDA or ID back.

>Janitor
>You are the Traitor.
>hijack the shuttle to ensure no Nanotrasen crew escape alive
>*snap crackel*
>decide to do this the right way
>do a few sheets of paperwork to get access to cargo and medical, insulated gloves and a tool belt
>the HOP seems to fall in love with me and grants it all
>stash everything in the closet
>service borg is spraying the entire fucking station
>begin cleaning the entire fucking station
>do literally nothing traitorous at all
>some greyshirt walks down the hallway
>*BLAM*
>You're hit by a bullet in the head!
>*BLAM*
>You're hit by a bullet in the head!
>fall into crit, get dragged off to a corner in maintenance
>die, greyshirt doesn't even take anything off of me
>no one clones me although I had suit sensors set to max

I know it's ridiculous by default to get mad at spessmen, specially at dying while an antag but this is a really, really bad feeling.

I like to run a gimmick when I get traitor, I get sleeping carp, maybe an agent ID, and and dress like a ninja. Instead of running around punching people I just grab a plant, a box, or some other method of hiding and make myself look as suspicious as humanly possible. following people, hiding in shadows, showing up in places I am not supposed to be in. If I get spotted or attacked, I immedately run away, using the sleeping carp to prevent insta-down taser shots.

and of course some asshole eventually ruins the fun. I cant count how many times a HoS or Captain dont roll with the gimmick and just flashbang or stun baton me and instamurder instead of cuffing for roleplay memes, it is frustrating, what would be a half hour of silliness gets ruined in minutes because valids.

More people need to roll with obvious traitor gimmicks, you dont WIN SS13 by validing all the traitors, thats how you get boring as fuck rounds.

didn't you know
the best fun is had by stealing other people's fun

Dr_bee wrote:I like to run a gimmick when I get traitor, I get sleeping carp, maybe an agent ID, and and dress like a ninja. Instead of running around punching people I just grab a plant, a box, or some other method of hiding and make myself look as suspicious as humanly possible. following people, hiding in shadows, showing up in places I am not supposed to be in. If I get spotted or attacked, I immedately run away, using the sleeping carp to prevent insta-down taser shots.

and of course some asshole eventually ruins the fun. I cant count how many times a HoS or Captain dont roll with the gimmick and just flashbang or stun baton me and instamurder instead of cuffing for roleplay memes, it is frustrating, what would be a half hour of silliness gets ruined in minutes because valids.

More people need to roll with obvious traitor gimmicks, you dont WIN SS13 by validing all the traitors, thats how you get boring as fuck rounds.

I remember you, I brigged you once, but then decided to let you go despite clown HoS demanding valids. It later turned out that it was DA, and clown was a traitor.

Plunderphonics wrote:>Janitor
>You are the Traitor.
>hijack the shuttle to ensure no Nanotrasen crew escape alive
>*snap crackel*
>decide to do this the right way
>do a few sheets of paperwork to get access to cargo and medical, insulated gloves and a tool belt
>the HOP seems to fall in love with me and grants it all
>stash everything in the closet
>service borg is spraying the entire fucking station
>begin cleaning the entire fucking station
>do literally nothing traitorous at all
>some greyshirt walks down the hallway
>*BLAM*
>You're hit by a bullet in the head!
>*BLAM*
>You're hit by a bullet in the head!
>fall into crit, get dragged off to a corner in maintenance
>die, greyshirt doesn't even take anything off of me
>no one clones me although I had suit sensors set to max

I know it's ridiculous by default to get mad at spessmen, specially at dying while an antag but this is a really, really bad feeling.

This is why i hate murderboners, it's not just because i ded but they also actively prevent other traitor gimmicks by either murdering them or getting the shuttle called before they're set up

keep in mind the >no one clones me although I had suit sensors set to max
not like the crew fucking helped, if anyone was mildly competent then there would be no issues

Playing as CE when about 15 minutes into the shift I swing by the department to check on the engine.
There's a lawyer with a tool belt, puzzling over the tank dispenser.
Suspicious, I approach asking why he has all the plasma tanks laying around; mouse hovering over my baton.
"How much plasma is 30 moles?" Is the reply I get. ಠ_ಠ
I decide the give the newbie a break and not metagame the objective and explain that it's a single full tank worth of plasma. I start to write up something to the effect of 'now get out of here kid.' When out comes the weapons and I'm shot dead.
He then proceeds to empty the plasma canister trying to fill the tank.

I mean.. c'mon man. Help me help you.

TL;DR newbie traitor asks for help with objective, kills the guy who offered help, still manages to fuck up his objective.

MimicFaux wrote:Playing as CE when about 15 minutes into the shift I swing by the department to check on the engine.
There's a lawyer with a tool belt, puzzling over the tank dispenser.
Suspicious, I approach asking why he has all the plasma tanks laying around; mouse hovering over my baton.
"How much plasma is 30 moles?" Is the reply I get. ಠ_ಠ
I decide the give the newbie a break and not metagame the objective and explain that it's a single full tank worth of plasma. I start to write up something to the effect of 'now get out of here kid.' When out comes the weapons and I'm shot dead.
He then proceeds to empty the plasma canister trying to fill the tank.

I mean.. c'mon man. Help me help you.

TL;DR newbie traitor asks for help with objective, kills the guy who offered help, still manages to fuck up his objective.

this hurts to read

one time as a cargo tech
>go to conveyor
>loading 20 crates
>planning to order monkeys and do a meme
>order monkeys
>Get killed by drake before getting to monkey stash fuck

Wrong thread

D&B wrote:Wrong thread

???????????????? u wat mate

bman wrote:

D&B wrote:Wrong thread

???????????????? u wat mate

Did you mean to post it in the stories of awesome?

D&B wrote:

bman wrote:

D&B wrote:Wrong thread

???????????????? u wat mate

Did you mean to post it in the stories of awesome?

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

ur right im dumb ill go put a story here and switch them out

>Be mime
>Sign up with a name making fun of Klara Ellstrom
>Klara Ellstrom happens to be desword murderboning
>Continues to murderbone me
>Deswording
>Legs dismembered
>Cry
>Crit
>Klara feels bad for me, takes me to medbay, breaks the med storage window with the desword to heal me
>As thanks, pickpocket Klara's desword when out of crit
>Start attacking, Klara runs out of the room
>Follow her
>Slip on the broken window glass because no feet
>gg

it was going so well

>mime detective
>pax logs in and starts bitching me out for not adminning
>pax is also not adminning
>pax is next to me IC (though I don't believe he knew who I was? whatever)
>try to say hi
>pushes me onto water
>this is literally the least surprising event in the history of the universe
>sigh because that's the only way I can express myself
>he tries to take my headset

>mime

>he tries to take my headset

seriously this just makes me so fucking mad

I WAS A MIME

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PAX YOU RETARD

he got crushed though so its ok

Qbopper wrote:he got crushed though so its ok

Wrong thread.

cedarbridge wrote:

Qbopper wrote:he got crushed though so its ok

Wrong thread.

the "it's okay" is me trying to cope with the endless rage consuming me because of how unbelievably stupid pax was

>be ling
>after being enemy number one for a while, get arrested
>officer brings me in
>hos, cap, det, and three officers bring me into the perma hallway, towards the execution room.
>cap puts his sword on the hallway table for some reason
>suprise monkey form out of my cuffs
>scurry towards the vent as the officers try to shoot me and end up hitting each other
>waitaminute.jpg
>run back to table, grab cap's sword
>start slicing people
>realize i'm losing the fight
>scurry back to the vent
>'You cannot enter the vent with items'
>die and get gibbed

Qbopper wrote:I WAS A MIME

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PAX YOU RETARD

he got crushed though so its ok

mimes can still talk

>be roboticist
>be debraining a guy via surgery like a decent person
>lizard roboticist asshole comes up and saws the guy in the head 10 times then cuts his head apart leaving the empty head, eyes, tongue and a fuckton of blood all over robotics
>get called an inefficient muppet


I WANT TO DIE.

bandit wrote:

Qbopper wrote:I WAS A MIME

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PAX YOU RETARD

he got crushed though so its ok

mimes can still talk

>implying I would be so trash as to break my vow

disgusting, I'm actually offended you think that little of me

nowadays a fuckload of mimes use pdas, and fucking half the crew thinks that doesn't fucking count as talking, those sacks of shit.

confused rock wrote:nowadays a fuckload of mimes use pdas, and fucking half the crew thinks that doesn't fucking count as talking, those sacks of shit.

we're getting off topic

let's get back to why bryce is a fucking dumb fat idiot poopy head for not even stealing my shoulder holster or literally anything better than a mime's radio

even if I broke my vow and talked the crew would lynch me so it's not like I'm going to

what, would he rather he leave you naked?

leave it to the lizard to bring the subject to nakedness

confused rock wrote:what, would he rather he leave you naked?

steal my gun and execute me it's better

bandit wrote:leave it to the lizard to bring the subject to nakedness

b

t

f

o

Qbopper wrote:

cedarbridge wrote:

Qbopper wrote:he got crushed though so its ok

Wrong thread.

the "it's okay" is me trying to cope with the endless rage consuming me because of how unbelievably stupid pax was

what use could an assistant have for a security headset, detective mime?

IcePacks wrote:

Qbopper wrote:

cedarbridge wrote:

Qbopper wrote:he got crushed though so its ok

Wrong thread.

the "it's okay" is me trying to cope with the endless rage consuming me because of how unbelievably stupid pax was

what use could an assistant have for a security headset, detective mime?

none when I go to security and tell them "hey sec radio is compromised", also you liar you came up with that reason afterwards you know fully well it was to do the "ASSISTANT MURDERING ME IN HALLS HE TOOK MY RADIO" gimmick

though to be fair knowing how people play sec I doubt anyone would care and would continue to spout sensitive info over the channel

telling sec that the radio is comprised will do nothing

IcePacks wrote:telling sec that the radio is comprised will do nothing

Qbopper wrote:though to be fair knowing how people play sec I doubt anyone would care and would continue to spout sensitive info over the channel

>be me
>be assistant
>having a fun day assistanting
>play orion trail
>win
>yay
>go outside botany and use xeno toy
>people start freaking out
>give it to clown
>hes happy so am I
>out of no where mutagened 2401 times by a shitter
>blind
>deaf
>mute
>unable to express myself
>comic sans
>oh yeah and I'm a gril now
>fml
>walk around to medbay
> i think "OH ILL WRITE ON PAPER"
>blind people can't write on paper
>why
>I'm fucked
>find a metagamey glitch solution that makes me feel sick to do
>rename papers for messages
>*shudder*
>point to them
>blind people can point I guess
>papers titled "kyp astar is blind deaf and mute help me"
>I feel like a cheater
>healed and eventually regain senses but that guilt lasts forever...

Remove blinds renaming paper and pointing when?

All regret

why didn't you just kill yourself

>assistant goose mcswan
>see two other assistants (i forgot their names, it was maybe luck or bon nuit and some other guy i think terry mcfall??)
>terry makes a spear and sec immediately gets RING RING
>sec chases us after we evade all of their tasers like we're in the matrix
>yaketysax
>finally caught
>hos edward sloan
>all 3 of us get gulagged for a high price
>lizard lawyer asks to be gulagged too and comes along

>i know what i must do... my legacy...
>"i will save you guys, i will die in the process, remember me"
>i stuff all of the shitposters in the oxygen crate
>walk over the lava separating gulag and mining base, enduring the pain like pure manlyhood, sacrificing self for team mates
>thanks to a twist of fate they found an extinguisher, extinguished me and healed me with ointment just enough for me to survive

>now we're in mining station
>a miner approaches
>donatello versus
>he immediately shouts "prisoners in gulag1111111!" like an uncool faggot who you wouldnt show your secret handshake
>we tell him we're cool and unarmed
>he pdas hos and hos tells him to kill us
>he wants his valids except we're not

>lizard pulls his box to the front of the base but he shoots the lizard so it dunks his box in lava
>he shoots down the lizard dead while we screAM "DUDE STOP WE'RE COOL"
>keeps shooting us
>me and luck and terry (i think) get sick and tired of his shit
>i beat his head in with a pick and eat some shots for luck who punches the fuck out of him.

>traps himself with the mining pod in a chunk of stone
>i mine in and he gets rekt

>miner with an infinite ranged weapon, stims, armor, a survival knife dies to two tiders, NICE.
>we did it, we avenged our lizard frien- OH GOD WHO'S SHOOTING THOSE LASERS
>sloan and another guy shooting us up with lethals like we're school children
>we scatter but they get luck
>i go under a rock and hide hoping they wont find me, since i was already A DEAD MAN WALKING FROM: 1. walking on molten metals, 2. enduring various high power KA shots.

>they find me, i close my eyes and die the death of every tider.

thus ends the tale of the three tiders who fought prejudice and the prejudice won.

and this is how three loving, caring, and passionate young men died because ONE of us made a spear.

tbh donatello is never not a shitler

He sank my ore box first t b h

another short donatello story

>be syndie
>wanna do j-loz syndie prize radio show meme
>give out gifts
>ask questions
>have fun
>never kill anyone or use my TCs for my self

>get arrested
>it's donatello versus the captain
>he wants me dead
>drags me to crematorium
>im like "why are you cancerously validhunty all i wanted to do was give out gifts"
>"sorry next time dont get caught"
>puts me in the incinerator tray
>doesnt stun me like a mongoloid

>I GET OUT AND RUN THROUGH 3 OPEN DOORS THAT CLOSE -JUST- AS I ENTER THROUGH THEM, AND I RAN BOY, I RAN AS FAST AS MY LEGS COULD TAKE ME.

>live rest of my round in fear after cheating death

funny af

>be Warden
>kyp astar
>havin a nice day
>gulag some guy for being a violent shitter
>hear word of cult
>CLUCK CULT!
>oi vay
>chap comes in feeding everyone holy water
>k
>use implants
>some cultist starts taunting us over radio screaming WGW
>he tells us where he is
>ai room
>he feels ROBUST
>suit every officer with everything we have
>hand out all mine and the hos's spare armor clothes
>reddy 2 dye
>get sec force to AI tube
>I go in first
>I'm ready
>I FEEL ROBUST
>the cult fucks blocked off the exit from the tube
>I can't climb back in
>can't move
>others come in and get stuck with me
>theres a hole in space
>we all die from cold, lack of oxygen, pressure, and anger
>rattard summoned
>My least favorite round ever
>0/10 ban whoever did this

bman wrote:>assistant goose mcswan
>see two other assistants (i forgot their names, it was maybe luck or bon nuit and some other guy i think terry mcfall??)
>terry makes a spear and sec immediately gets RING RING
>sec chases us after we evade all of their tasers like we're in the matrix
>yaketysax
>finally caught
>hos edward sloan
>all 3 of us get gulagged for a high price
>lizard lawyer asks to be gulagged too and comes along

>i know what i must do... my legacy...
>"i will save you guys, i will die in the process, remember me"
>i stuff all of the shitposters in the oxygen crate
>walk over the lava separating gulag and mining base, enduring the pain like pure manlyhood, sacrificing self for team mates
>thanks to a twist of fate they found an extinguisher, extinguished me and healed me with ointment just enough for me to survive

>now we're in mining station
>a miner approaches
>donatello versus
>he immediately shouts "prisoners in gulag1111111!" like an uncool faggot who you wouldnt show your secret handshake
>we tell him we're cool and unarmed
>he pdas hos and hos tells him to kill us
>he wants his valids except we're not

>lizard pulls his box to the front of the base but he shoots the lizard so it dunks his box in lava
>he shoots down the lizard dead while we screAM "DUDE STOP WE'RE COOL"
>keeps shooting us
>me and luck and terry (i think) get sick and tired of his shit
>i beat his head in with a pick and eat some shots for luck who punches the fuck out of him.

>traps himself with the mining pod in a chunk of stone
>i mine in and he gets rekt

>miner with an infinite ranged weapon, stims, armor, a survival knife dies to two tiders, NICE.
>we did it, we avenged our lizard frien- OH GOD WHO'S SHOOTING THOSE LASERS
>sloan and another guy shooting us up with lethals like we're school children
>we scatter but they get luck
>i go under a rock and hide hoping they wont find me, since i was already A DEAD MAN WALKING FROM: 1. walking on molten metals, 2. enduring various high power KA shots.

>they find me, i close my eyes and die the death of every tider.

thus ends the tale of the three tiders who fought prejudice and the prejudice won.

and this is how three loving, caring, and passionate young men died because ONE of us made a spear.

Ah yes I remember this round. At that point I killed you for killing Donatello, not having a spear. The gulag for spear wasn't even for the spear, it was because you idiots started helping each other up and running away pulling each other WHEN I JUST WANTED TO TAKE THE SPEAR.

I think I touched an ahelp like this once... déjà vu

MimicFaux wrote:I think I touched an ahelp like this once... déjà vu

I remember getting bwoinked by you... good times

MimicFaux wrote:I think I touched an ahelp like this once... déjà vu

Terry did it.

also donatello was gonna kill us tbh you should've cremated him for dying to 2 greys while he had antistuns and shit

4 Greys

There was a dead burned husk.

And I was returning with damage from a drake.

D&B wrote:4 Greys

There was a dead burned husk.

And I was returning with damage from a drake.

well thats if u count the lawyer but you tore their asshole apart almost immediately

regardless it was funny so who cares