/tg/Station 13

Bottom post of the previous page:

>be celerystation
>join as det
>like 1 officer, me, warden and HoS but everything is going smoothly
>Find a gang tag, scan for prints, it was the chap.
>tell sec radio about it, we keep it quiet.
>hear on common the chap is attacking people.
>nobody is trying to arrest them, I take it into my own hands
>they try to BS over common that I'm being shitcurity, I reveal that they're a gang head over comms to protect my image.
>they get arrested
>round going normally, hear on radio that there's a xeno queen in xenobio, ignore it. We had gangs to deal with
>in my office checking prints when clown busts in
>pull out my gun, dodge a pie he throws.
>he slips me on his PDA
>"wew"
>he uses an implant breaker and converts me
>Later on, I talk to the HoP (another gangmember) and get armory access
>fill a locker with weapons, hear over comms that a xeno escaped but it was put down
>bring locker into the bridge, our gang's 'base'
>we're winning by far, and I suit up in bulletproof armor with a riot shield and a combat shotty I found in the contraband locker
>We roll out killing hostile gangmembers when I hear that the xenos broke containment
>oshit.jpg
>our gang head can't find a place to put the dom
>xenos infect most of the station, about 70% of the crew is dead either from xenos or gangs.
>After like 5-10 minutes, Xenos reach the sec wing, where our gang is.
>I go xeno hunting, and kill several because of my riot shield, which deflects all their attacks.
>feel like a badass
>too many xenos overrunning the station, about 90% of crew dead
>me, two lieutenants and our boss retreat to the captain's office with our weapons locker
>Xenos find us, and I spam out buckshot through the door to the office.
>each time a xeno pounces, they bounce off my shield and eat lead.
>xenos flank behind and kill the rest of my comrades
>My shield is holding them off as I blast through waves of xenos
>they surround me on all sides, but are afraid of my shotty
>one xeno runs towards me in a rage
>I unload mabye four shots before he disarms me
>my shotgun on the ground, I shield bash him
>the xeno is heavily damaged, but disarmed me again
>i drop my shield
>goodnightsweetprinse.svg
>i embrace death as he swipes me into crit and huggers me
>I whisper my last breath of resistance, "You'll never take me alive..." and die, making his hugger worthless

I died but it was probably the best round I ever had. I think I was the last non-huggered person alive.

Wizard appeared in the slime pens today at work. He was armed with a spell blade. He rudely smashed his way out of the enclosure. I politely baton'd him in return and smashed his head in with his own sword. A Borg watched the whole thing but the wizard had made himself a golem so it was beuno.

Spent the rest of the round with looted wizard goodies: a glowing cape, a mind swap apprentice, the spell blade, and a ban hammer. Glory to Nanotrasen.

>Be me
>Not you
>Signed up as miner and do pretty well, got a drake down and enough ore in my first run to get almost 4k points.
>HoP announces over comms warden is gulagging them for taking sechuds
>Everyone calls the warden shit
>Decide to help the escapee not die to lava
>Put him out with a fire extinguisher and help him get some clothes
>Hatch up a quick plan so he can get rid of the Warden and get his shit back (he was acting captain and I was bored)
>Yell in mining channel as soon as I grab the attention of sec by blowing a tank and running on fire into everyone
>tell to myself I'll probably get banned for doing that while I was alone and deaf fuck you whoever ahelped that
>HoP manages to stop the warden powergrab, gets his shit back
>Run away from the remaining sec officers because my distraction stuck
>Get beaten by an asimov borg, beaten by a virologist while the borg watches, and suffer deep burns as the borg removes my drake suit while I was on fire
>Get spaced by a ling scientist and smother in my salt
>Ghost around and see the pretty stars
>Later on HoP comes back and rescues my body
>Just walk around sullen because I lost my drake suit
>Lane fucking Stewart pulls up a great card from their sleeve and give it back to me (they safe kept it after the borg confiscated it.)
>End up not going into the shuttle since the HoP got linged

Most thrilling round I've had in a long while.

Older story but w/e

>be botanist
>dont care about the weaponized autism that is throwing plants
>my mind is set on one thing only
>BEES
>order bees from cargo
>instantly approved
>take bees to botany and continue my order of operations
>some time passes
>i now have two bee hives and every tile has a bee on it
>a cry is heard on common of xenomorphs
>oh shit
>start walling off
>nobody will touch my bees
>a survivor manages to enter with a space suit
>helps me fortify
>amused bee god, DennyBee, watches from the clouds
>xenomorphs have made little attempt to enter
>emergency shuttle is very close to arriving
>DennyBee comes in as the bee fairy
>asks us for wishes
>other survivor suggests that we fled our mortal coils
>agree
>get made into a 3x3 bee named Bee-ryce
>fly into shuttle
>the alien queen orders her children not to slash me
>tempt not the mercy of bees
>fly around the queen, stinging them repeatedly
>it does minimal damage but it pisses the other aliens off
>for the next 2 minutes and 30 seconds get chased around by pissed off xenomorphs trying to kill me
>shuttle docks
>backup has arrived
>the last thing the xenomorphs see before fade to black is the wrath of the TRUE swarm

One of those small time stories, I liked the situation.

>Be chef
>Preparing the usual, without much incident, other than a bored greytider who wanted to griff a bit.
>boom
>Second round in a row with a mad bomber, oh well, I'm a chef this time, so not my monkey, not my circus.
>boom
>boom
>boom
>A lot of bombs, seriously a lot, one of them happened quite near, I even saw the burning debris
>Still cooking, because this is my job, why should I care about bombings? the brotanists seem to agree with the sentiment.
>Well, I should've cared, since the next one happened nearby.
>some items start hitting me, I even get to shout to the brotanists to grab their internals before the shockwave finally hits me square.
>I'm on fire, flashing red, and the kitchen is losing both pressure and air.
>luckily I manage to the fire out on the first try, I decide to enter the backroom, I won't make it otherwise.
>Ok, no biggie, I'll simply eat a bit and put on internals, then go to medbay
>No right arm, I can't open the box.
>only a sugar bottle and a bit of milk on me.
>I am not going to die here.
>I check a bit the kitchen, trying not to get exposed to vacuum, it's no use, all the food got burnt, I gotta do with what I have.
>I check maint, I'm recovering a bit, so I'll be able to try and exit through the exit, I got lucky and found internals, and a bit further, a wrench and a crowbar.
>health points at orange, but I'm sure it's borderline red, if I mess up I'll fall unconscious and no one will bother looking for me, using the PDA didn't work.
>Finally I decide to be brave and enter hypodronics through the kitchen, the vacuum hurts, but not enough to slow me down.
>The brotanics are dead, most likely the explosion killed one on the spot, the other one died near the door, I don't even stop, grabbing the first on my way to the exit.
>I'm flashing red again, door's locked, but the wall was broken, only a crystal chair remains in my way.
>Finally in medbay the brotanist is taken by the doctors, while I try to treat myself with some synthflesh, only then I pay attention to the pool of blood I'm making.
>I get treated and I go rescue the other brotanist, only then I get to go the shuttle and start behaving like the PSTD victim I should be.


Small time, as I said, but those unlikely survivals are nice once in a while, I really thought I was dead the moment I saw the items hitting me, and lacking both an arm and food almost made impossible to escape the kitchen.

To open a box one-handed, you can drop it and drag its sprite to your character, it'll open the inventory. It also works with boxes inside backpacks so you don't have to take them out.

JUST FOR GAGS: THE ROUND.

You have my seal of approval.

>Be viro
>WEE OOO WAR OPS
>Jesus christ why have there been so many war op games lately
>Decide to not grab a gun and try fighting the ops for once
>Make heals virus instead
>Distribute heals virus
>Crew resilience exponentially improved thanks to me
>Okay now it's time to gear up
>Get cap ID as the ops blow up my PDA
>Fucking annoying faggots
>Heals virus pops me back to full in no time
>Sec has been picked over quite thoroughly
>Manage to nab some HoS armor and a sec belt
>Go to cargo for a gun
>Combat shotties are in
>Grab one
>Go to CE for his boots
>Nobody's taken them
>Fools!
>Very solidly geared up now
>Ops arrive
>Crew intercept one in maint and swarm them
>Watch from a slight distance
>BEEP BEEP BEEP
>FUCK, RUN
>Area blows up from the macrobomb, escape unharmed because I reacted fast
>Wander around for a bit
>Op mech appears in the gateway hall
>Guy carrying an ion rifle for this exact situation locks it down
>Empty my shotgun in it
>Crew swarm and a shieldsuit op pops out of the wreckage
>His shieldsuit is instantly fried by ion man
>Baton him as he tries to fend us off with a mere pistol
>Two ops down, probably more I haven't seen
>Reload at cargo
>Wander around for a while scavenging new gear uneventfully
>Find a shotgun laying near a crit guy in a vaccumed area of maint
>Drag him to medbay and get him healed up
>He screams that an op has the disk, throwing a pinpointer at me
>OH SHIT NIGGER
>Grab it and bounce
>Find a guy with a hardsuit I had seen a few times
>Yell an op has the disk and I need his suit stat
>He gives me it and I sprint towards the disk
>It's in the QM's office on a random table
>Uhh, someone fucked up
>Grab it and am beset upon by a shieldsuit op in the hall
>Take cover behind a closet and prepare to shotgun him
>We do a little dance as we each try to shoot each other
>Suddenly he gets stunned by [something], I have no idea what
>Empty two shotguns in him
>Here lies the last op, may he rest in pieces
>Escape and win

Moral of the story: Rescuing dying people is an extremely important job and you should always help your fellow crew.

Not really "awesome" but also not really "frustrating", just... a weird round.

> Be roundstart engieborg with no AI.
> Set up SM as I was taught
> Guess SM was changed/tweaked as some point because it suddenly jumps up to like 80% instability
> Well... fuck...
> Prepare to freon that bitch... but just as I'm about to wrench it it goes boom already.
> Be MMI in space now, feel bad about screwing up SM, ask to be picked up by someone at some point.
> I dunno like 10+ minutes pass when RD comes to get me, but he was kind of blind and walked past me a couple of times.
> Another engieborg comes and sees me, rescues me, RD sees me now too and comes after us as we head to Robotics.
> RD quickly snatches me from Robotics because he wants me to be an AI instead of a borg.
> Oh... okay.
> Be put in AI core in RD's office but notice how everything in the office is depowered and ask if that will be alright.
> RD puts glass onto the core but doesn't screwdrive me to finish me into an AI.
> RD drags me out of his office and into the toxins storage... okay why?
> Begins to break down R.Walls to get into Xenobio... but why?
> Ask him what he's doing.
> He wants to give me power, since I look depowered.
> Explain AI's don't need wires and I'm actually just unfinished and need to be screwdrived to work.
> RD be like "Shush..."
> Plead with him for a while as he fumbles around with wires. "RD, please, no, I just, screwdrive me, no wires..."
> Everything also transmitted over radio so eventually someone picks up on it and offers to screwdrive me.
> When people come into toxin storage the RD just wrenched me down on a wire, I dunno who screwdrived me but I was finally finished.
> Though at this point the shuttle was almost there and I was carded anyway.

> Welp... that was an interesting roughly 50 minutes round of mostly sitting around because I was an MMI or an unfinished AI.

Was quite amusing though.

dionysus24779 wrote:words that kill

who was the RD?

I only barely remember a bit of his first name, but I don't want to make him look bad which is why I didn't mention specific names in the first place.

two stories

>ass on meta
>ass shittery
>SPIDERS IN SCI MAINT
>i got this fam
>die immediately
>respawn as spider
>spiders slowly take over the station despite the best (?) efforts of the captain and sec (i.e. cap tried to flood maint with plasma and light it but only ended up critting himself)
>spoder base in cargo as hunters bring in people and egg layers give them the succ
>medbay is last bastion of humanity
>vents welded but cloner is up
>spodertide busts down front door and floods in, destroys cloning and takes all the bodies for succing
>ert sent in
>immediately succ'd
>amount of spider roles being available is far past the amount of people able to fill them
>admemes eventually just set off nuke

spoder tide stationwide

---
>ass on meta again
>you are the blood cult
>kill cap and summon eldritch waifu
>well golly
>grab my gear and decide to try for cult leader
>actually get it
>ok then cultbros lets do this
>cargo has a base set up in warehouse but i make one in vacant office since nobody ever fucking goes there
>good shit going on, got papers and a few constructs
>some slipups with nearly being caught but i always keep spares of stunning paper so its all good
>tp one guy back to base only to find it exploded to all fucking hell
>what in the actual shit
>apparently was an anomaly in the bathrooms just next door that went off
>WHAT ARE THE ODDS SCREEEEEEEEEEEE
>ai sees the base and alerts the crew
>i limp out nearly in red with a construct shell and a shard
>ok goys cargo base new base
>think we're fucked but keep trying
>shuttle is called
>ok now or never
>find cap on bridge
>call it in with cultmaster chat
>surprising amount of people arrive, way more cultists than i thought we had
>maybesomethingnicewillhappen.jpg
>hack into caps office
>me and four other guys slip on soap that he laid down and he lasers us all
>WHYTHEFUCKWOULDANYTHINGNICEEVERHAPPEN.GIF
>dragged out in crit by another cultist and get a medibot to heal me
>out of crit, heal myself up
>WHERE IS CAP NOW
>after some conflicting reports find he's in armory
>hop somehow got culted so he lets us in
>cap naked and harrumphing
>throw out a quick rune and blow him harder than a two-cent whore
>OK BOIS LETS DO THIS
>tell cultbros present to kick down racks while i get the gang together with mass summon spell
>cult party in armory
>toss down summon rune and ring up narnar
>tell everyone drinks are on me in the underscape while narsie rips her way through our reality's asshole
>arm animation victory

considering how badly a lot of things went a lot of my cultmates were surprisingly competent and we pulled through for a good victory. gotta say the cultmaster update is a godsend, having big text to coordinate better and a mass summon spell relieves some massive headaches from having to scream "COME TO [LOCATION] TO SUMMON YOU FUCKS" for five minutes before you eventually give up and just make a ghost summon rune.

>i got an idea for an event!!
>spawn one nurse spider
>spawn one ice spider
>offer to ghosts
>play for a bit as one of the spiders (lucky me got one of the offers)
>die
>friend gets payday
>playday
>harold messages me after round ends
>admins had to nuke it
>sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit

Armhulen wrote:>i got an idea for an event!!
>spiders

I was the other spider!
Just from the two eggs we managed to lay we were becoming a problem.
The old nest got burned away in a plasma fire that took some of science and I think the captain down with it.
Before that happened I escaped in to the vents and began laying more eggs.
It didn't take long before we hit critical mass and an ERT team had to be sent in to nuke us.
All the spiders died.
But the spider eggs lived on and began hatching right after the nuke killed everyone.

Armhulen wrote:>i got an idea for an event!!
>spawn one nurse spider
>spawn one ice spider
>offer to ghosts
>play for a bit as one of the spiders (lucky me got one of the offers)
>die
>friend gets payday
>playday
>harold messages me after round ends
>admins had to nuke it
>sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit

>taking your own ghost role
disgust.png

Deitus wrote:

Armhulen wrote:>i got an idea for an event!!
>spawn one nurse spider
>spawn one ice spider
>offer to ghosts
>play for a bit as one of the spiders (lucky me got one of the offers)
>die
>friend gets payday
>playday
>harold messages me after round ends
>admins had to nuke it
>sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit

>taking your own ghost role
disgust.png

>offer to ghosts
>yes
>rng gives me it
>ok!

Armhulen wrote:

Deitus wrote:

Armhulen wrote:>i got an idea for an event!!
>spawn one nurse spider
>spawn one ice spider
>offer to ghosts
>play for a bit as one of the spiders (lucky me got one of the offers)
>die
>friend gets payday
>playday
>harold messages me after round ends
>admins had to nuke it
>sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit

>taking your own ghost role
disgust.png

>offer to ghosts
>yes
>rng gives me it
>ok!

>taking your own ghost role
disgust.png

Fine, I won't do that anymore, if it will let you sleep at night

not good enough
deadmin now

>Spawn as traitor CMO, steal moles of plasma
>Emag, silenced pistol and ammo
>Early on Oldman Robustin saws codwords, make contact on PDA
>Disguise in science maint, emag in, pistol two scientists
>Grab plasma, get away clean
>Intercept the two scientists at cloning, put them in the morgue
>Waiting it out, try to kill people when I can get away with it
>Try to kill a doctor, get robusted
>Takes me to surgery, cuts off all my arms and legs
>I'm doomed
>Oldman messages me on my PDA, he needs my hypospray
>My captor and his accomplice pretend to be me to lure him in
>They hide and after a super long wait robustin arrives
>Yell a warning as they jump out at him
>He kills them both with the revolver
>Puts my plasma in my bag and on my back
>Finds the hypo on a body
>Drags me to an escape pod
>Green text with no limbs

The entire baiting someone with a PDA was tense and fun.

This is kind of old but it was funny:

>roll tator
>see arm is online
>onlytrialmintiem4griff.jpg
>ask him to cut off both my legs in exchange for 2 tc
>being the dumb frog he is, he agrees
>buy a syndicate bomb
>spend like 10 minutes using chairs to grab supplies
>make a scooter
>plant bomb in arrivals
>scoot outta there
>clown disarms me off my scooter
>run from bomb on foot, er, hands
>bomb goes off, I'm close to it but everyone ignores me because I'm a legless cripple
>crawl into medbay
>with the 2 tc i traded for, i have enough for another syndiebomb
>buy one and plant it
>people call out that there's beeping and see me crawl from the scene of the crime
>ignore me, because I'm just a legless cripple
>bomb goes off, obliterating medbay
>never get caught

I did this two rounds in a row (lucky tator rolls) until Arm decided to stop trading with me

>find an otamatone cover of All Star in the discord
>ogg it
>https://file.house/5diz.ogg (it's fucking hilarious)
>get Arm to play it
>next round i roll tator
>trade all my tc to get Arm to turn me into a frog with 200 health
>he sets my attack sound to the entire 2 minute ogg
>?????
>profit

tacolizard wrote:>find an otamatone cover of All Star in the discord
>ogg it
>https://file.house/5diz.ogg (it's fucking hilarious)
>get Arm to play it
>next round i roll tator
>trade all my tc to get Arm to turn me into a frog with 200 health
>he sets my attack sound to the entire 2 minute ogg
>?????
>profit

I was laughing so fucking hard holy shit

I liked how you died to the AI after sitting in its core for TWO MINUTES without destroying the apc holy shit that was dumb

And then you whined that you lost your traitor round for THIS

Armhulen wrote:

tacolizard wrote:>find an otamatone cover of All Star in the discord
>ogg it
>https://file.house/5diz.ogg (it's fucking hilarious)
>get Arm to play it
>next round i roll tator
>trade all my tc to get Arm to turn me into a frog with 200 health
>he sets my attack sound to the entire 2 minute ogg
>?????
>profit

I was laughing so fucking hard holy shit

I liked how you died to the AI after sitting in its core for TWO MINUTES without destroying the apc holy shit that was dumb

And then you whined that you lost your traitor round for THIS

I forgot how to kill the AI and then i got salty. I also forgot you gave me hands, so I could've used medkits to heal myself

Armhulen wrote:

tacolizard wrote:>find an otamatone cover of All Star in the discord
>ogg it
>https://file.house/5diz.ogg (it's fucking hilarious)
>get Arm to play it
>next round i roll tator
>trade all my tc to get Arm to turn me into a frog with 200 health
>he sets my attack sound to the entire 2 minute ogg
>?????
>profit

I was laughing so fucking hard holy shit

I liked how you died to the AI after sitting in its core for TWO MINUTES without destroying the apc holy shit that was dumb

And then you whined that you lost your traitor round for THIS

The best part is how attack sounds get slowed down, sped up and pitch shifted to make them sound unique. I started crying when one of my attacks made the ogg play super slow at a satanically low pitch.

tacolizard wrote:

Armhulen wrote:

tacolizard wrote:>find an otamatone cover of All Star in the discord
>ogg it
>https://file.house/5diz.ogg (it's fucking hilarious)
>get Arm to play it
>next round i roll tator
>trade all my tc to get Arm to turn me into a frog with 200 health
>he sets my attack sound to the entire 2 minute ogg
>?????
>profit

I was laughing so fucking hard holy shit

I liked how you died to the AI after sitting in its core for TWO MINUTES without destroying the apc holy shit that was dumb

And then you whined that you lost your traitor round for THIS

The best part is how attack sounds get slowed down, sped up and pitch shifted to make them sound unique. I started crying when one of my attacks made the ogg play super slow at a satanically low pitch.

YES THAT ONE NEAR THE BAR WAS FANTASTIC

LIKE A DEMON SHREK

>latejoin assistant
>"MONKEYTIDE"
>"RUN"
>my time is now
>go into tool storage and make a spear
>stab a monkey
>FUCK there's a lot of them
>go back to make an IED
>get pissed off at the dumb new crafting because I'm used to tablecrafting
>figure it out (I was using cuffs and not a cable coil)
>officer walks past
>HELLO SIR I'M FIGHTING MONKEYS SIR
>they pin a medal to my chest
>THANK YOU SIR
>grab IED
>oh all the monkeys are dead and the shuttle is here
>get on
>leaves
>nothing interesting
>WHAT THE FUCK THERE'S LIKE 30 MONKEYS ON THE SHUTTLE NOW
>say my prayers
>a monkey opens the door to the medical room I'm in
>light the fuse
>it goes off instantly in my hand without warning
>blows my leg off and puts me into crit
>i'm laughing my fucking ass off

good round

Qbopper wrote:>latejoin assistant
>"MONKEYTIDE"
>"RUN"
>my time is now
>go into tool storage and make a spear
>stab a monkey
>FUCK there's a lot of them
>go back to make an IED
>get pissed off at the dumb new crafting because I'm used to tablecrafting
>figure it out (I was using cuffs and not a cable coil)
>officer walks past
>HELLO SIR I'M FIGHTING MONKEYS SIR
>they pin a medal to my chest
>THANK YOU SIR
>grab IED
>oh all the monkeys are dead and the shuttle is here
>get on
>leaves
>nothing interesting
>WHAT THE FUCK THERE'S LIKE 30 MONKEYS ON THE SHUTTLE NOW
>say my prayers
>a monkey opens the door to the medical room I'm in
>light the fuse
>it goes off instantly in my hand without warning
>blows my leg off and puts me into crit
>i'm laughing my fucking ass off

good round

iirc IEDs have a random fuse between 1 and 8 seconds.

it used to be 3 to 8 but they must have changed it

>Be Joseph Stalin
>Be captain
>Gear up, secure da disk and da spare id and da everything
>Secure da medals
>Nearly start a civil war on the station due to making a worker's rights and racial and species equality bill
>Centcom unleashes monkey virus on us
>Get on my full gear set to minimize exposed flesh for biting.
>Hide in my office for half the round due to monkies somehow getting in bridge
>"We need a human for genetics so we can cure the monkies"
>runs to medbay, scans my DNA
>Borgs a monkey
>Almost get assasinated, but monkey slips on banana peel
>Borgs are to kill all monkies
> Defend the escape hallway
>Kill multiple monkies with my blade
>Make sure there are survivors
>Win round
>As stalin
>GG

>assistant of box
>tator tots
>wew lad
>grabbing my gear as captain announces that there will be a united nations meeting in front of the bridge in a few minutes
>thinking.jpg
>hide in one of my secret spots nearby and bide my time
>meeting is about to convene
>use all my tc on carp
>put em in a locker
>go to meeting area
>FOR GREYSHIRTIA
>open the locker and spray fire extinguisher everywhere
>carp massacre

some other shit happened with me escaping from perma and chilli'n with a ling but that was pretty much the high point so ill just leave it out

>Cult round
>I have no clue that it's cult round
>Was cargo tech
> Spot someone filling a room full of fuel tanks
>Looks like fun, come up to it with a welder to spook them.
>Some fucker knocks me down
>CULTCULTCULT
>Escape from cucktist
>Use flashbang
>Run to the fuel tanks and picks up my lit welder
>Fucker starts converting me
>Clock cucklt
>Dude in the middle of the fuel tanks commits welderbomb jihad . (There were 8 or 9 of them)
>Everyone near the tanks dies.
>I'm not mad
>the cultist isnt mad
>the suicide bomber isnt mad
>The admins arent mad
Everyone liked that little jihad

>observe
>it's a Ratvar round
>well, time to wait around for a soul vessel or something- BLEB RANDOM EVENT
>spawn in maint by the CMO's office on meta
>start fighting off the crew
>they call the shuttle because "everything is fucked"
>everyone trying to fight me either dies or runs away
>spread into the halls, science and escape unopposed
>something starts delaying the shuttle
>what the hell?
>find out it's yet another weird Ratvar thing
>spread toward their base as they begin summoning Ratvar
>get swarmed by scarabs and borgs trying to defend the portal
>completely fail to stop the summoning
>well, at least i can still go to centcomm
>deploy a node on the shuttle and relocate my core while they attempt to reach escape
>some scarabs, borgs and cultists still try to stop me
>slaughter them all
>successful bleb shuttle hijack

Lost the screenshots. But alas. Somwhat fuzzy
Look at all the ook! Literally next round These kinda rounds continued for awhile with everyone getting chances at the glory moments like a wizard the next round killing me roundstart.

This is how Krusvik became my favorite admin.

[center]Tales from Spaaaaace!![/center]
[center]With one arm tied behind my back[/center]

Rolling nuke op and excited to be starring in my own action movie. It's a small team, only four of us instead of the usual five. Today, we are the Beastieboys! The leader, having given us our name immediately decides he wants nothing to do with the responsibility and asks if anyone wants his ID and lead the team. I promptly volunteer. We swap IDs, and I rub my greedy lil hands together, "Alright operatives, what's the plan?" I suggest that we can try our luck and go stealth, or probably lose but have more fun declaring war. We decide on stealth. One of the new guys suggests we all pile into a locker, and one guy undercover in assistant plainclothes drags it around, and we ambush the captain like this. I support the idea. "Ah, the old Sardine Surprise tactic. Classic." It's not. I made it up, but once given a name, all the other operatives love it.

First order of business, "Does everyone here know how to fly a jetpack and / or is this your first time as an operative. No shame in it, just let me know so I can help you." One guy volunteers he's never had a chance to use jetpacks, I fill him in. Seriously, it takes fifteen seconds to explain. I remember my first time, spacing myself accidentally. I've seen other operatives do it too. No reason for it if it can be prevented. One guy, Brandon Beastieboys, has already purchased an elite hardsuit and is pointing frantically at the shutter doors button. I tell him to be patient until everyone knows what they're doing. One operative comes back from the locker room with the Ion rifle, and accidentally shoots me. Rolling my eyes I reset my headset and start assigning tasks. Brandon, the over-eager beaver, will blow the armoury after we spring our surprise. Dustin, the newbie, will be the undercover agent pulling the locker. Marc and myself will be in the locker armed to the teeth. The guy with the ion rifle at this point accidentally fires again and manages to EMP the rest of the team.
>facepalm
After going over the basics once more, and doling out gear. I got Fungal Tuberculosis grenades at a massive discount, and inoculate the team. I go on a hunch and call out for a radio check. No one responds. I ask again out loud and Brandon quickly radios in. Marc and Dustin are still with dead headsets and we have to explain how to get them going again. Satisfied everyone knows their job, and how to work their equipment at a base level, I open the shutters and we all pile on. Everyone gears up. I grab the syndie bombs and a spare block of c4 for myself.

We drop Brandon off outside the armoury where he'll chill in space until either we're spotted or pull off the ambush on the captain. We bring the shuttle around to the other side the station and make our approach. Murphy's law comes out in full force and announces a meteor storm. I'm conflicted whether or not to simply retreat to the base and wait it out. But then I feel conflicted about if Brandon might get randomly struck. Maybe it's a false aler-- BOOM. Nope. Fuck it, let's just get going. Dustin takes hold of the loaded locker and steps out into the loading dock. I remind him to engage his suits helmet. Now he's outside into space. He's now out in vacuum. I insist he engages the suits helmet. At least he knows how to use the jetpack. He engages it... in combat mode. Not wishing for one of our members to be so hurt before even hitting station-side, I tell him urgently to engage the face-plate. After a short delay, I tell him to click on the helmet icon. It finally snaps shut and he's properly space-proof. I pray to RNGesus to get us through this round. Now, the plan WAS to find an assistant's uniform and a gas mask in maint, and proceed with the infiltration, but poor Dustin, injured as he was from space exposure, isn't quite fast enough to pull the locker in through the airlock before it gets sucked back out to spacewind. Two more attempts are thwarted. By the time he tries for a third, a lawyer and another bystander spot us by escape and our cover is blown. I kick open the locker door and rush out, calling to Brandon to blow the armoury. I start shooting the two unfortunates before they can scream for help, but it's too late and the gig is up.

Brandon radios back to blow his planted bomb. I tap the Red Button, but it failed to find an armed bomb. This is the last I hear from Brandon Beastieboys. I drop the FT grenade below metastation's corporate showcase, a nice busy intersection for maximum effect. Sadly largely thwarted due to the existing presence of a healing virus (with only a single infection per spessman allowed). I make a point to blow medbay with one of my syndie bombs to mitigate recovery and help us in the attrition side of the conflict. The shuttle gets called around this time and I make a note to track down a head of staff and get that shit recalled ASAP. I follow the disk's signature to the bridge, and from the sounds of it, the captain and the clown are having tea in his quarters. I plant the bomb and hope to get a quick kill on them both. At this point Marc and Dustin split off to hunt down the crew / Disk on their own and any semblance of a plan falls apart. Things look up when the HoS shows up! I need that ID! I hotswap my equipment, and to my much amusement, this particular HoS has no idea how a e-shield works and stuns himself. Perfect. I close in for the kill and a borg rushes by and sweeps the HoS away. Less perfect. Things get REALLY weird when an assistant catgirl attacks me with goddamn spellblade that I can only assume the miners found early. Caught completely off guard I immediately lose my left arm; grateful at least that it wasn't one of my legs, I quickly gun her down and take the sword for myself, to save on ammo. Injured, and with no way to reattach my own arm, I double back to medbay to stem the bleeding and at least get myself combat ready again when I'm rushed by security officers on either side. They at least have the wherewithal to draw batons instead of tasers. I get a lucky strike on the first one. Despite wearing a riot shield on his back, and wielding an extra one for maximum block, I manage to drop him on the first strike and finish him off in the relative safety of the crater that is the bridge while the other one circles around. There's a scuffle with a scientist and a nearby beepsky stuns one or both of them. I ignore them to their own stoogery and start to head to medbay. Outside of the reach of the vacuum, another officer with a baton is a little more prepared and does manage to land a hit and drops me. I wait a half second to see what he does. He doesn't attack again, instead too caught up in my dropped loot.
He grabs my sword and takes a moment to feel proud of himself. I pop adrenals
[youtube]aNC9ObAqeUI[/youtube]

Re-armed, I limp to medbay to deal with my bleeding stump. The HoS is just coming out as I approach, and we engage in a bit of yakkity sax, but I can only assume he wasn't fully healed as I'm able to gun him down quickly. I drag him to the far end of medbay and loot him for his ID. His guns are all empty, so I leave them behind. By now, I'm hearing the crew members shout boasts onto the syndicate radio and I can only assume I'm the last one standing. I pick my way through the ruined station, avoiding the crew when I can, being mindful about my remaining ammo. The cyborgs are repairing the holes in the station, and largely ignore me. The recall goes without a hitch, and I breathe a sigh of relief, now I have time to actually hunt down the disk. As luck would have it, the captain himself shows up. Armed with his space suit and a baton he charges me and we engage in risky melee combat. It's close quarters, and I need multiple hits to bring him down, whereas he needs one. I don't want to drop the sword for risk of losing my other arm. It's a tense moment of swings, but he drops and I immediately look to my pinpointer. Yup! ! At some point an atmos tech threw a metal foam grenade into the captain's office, so I make a small tunnel and hide inside there while I pick through the captain's belongings. Pockets? No. Backpack, yes. Internals box, check. With one arm, I pocket the entire box, rather than bother with further digging. Like any good operative, I then make a sprint for space.

The shuttle is in pretty rough shape. Most distressingly are the large number of holes leading into the interior. I cross my remaining fingers and hope the nuke wasn't stolen by any curious meta-game explorers. Luckily, everything is still there. I grab the nuke and prepare to arm.
: Radiation pulse detected: 20 RADs
Wat.
The nuke is leaking? Was it the meteors? I don't stop to worry about it. I'm hurt, and want to finish this quickly. In the back of my mind, I keep asking myself, "Why aren't nuclear operatives shielded against radiation?" I take the nuke to toxins for irony and tuck it in next to the hardsuit storage. Disk in. Code... check notes...
8..2..2
You can almost hear something...
MOTHERFUCKER. I pass out from radiation poisoning.
3..6
Toggle Anchor
You can almost hear something...
Toggle Safety
Time: ---
You can almost hear something...
At this point I'm in the red and limp away, and beeline it for the toxin medkit in the other room.
Ahelp: Is the nuke -supposed- to be leaking radiation like this?
I pop charcoal pills like they're candy. Waiting for the meds to kick in. A visitor pops in briefly, and I've the mouse hovering over the Cr-20. I'm so incredibly exposed. Helmet down, mask on the table, very obviously treating my own injuries with the medkit next to me. They piss off, and I feel well enough to finish the job.

Time: 20-
You can almost hear something...
Time: 200
Start timer.
The station goes delta, and I decide that after all that, one final bit of BM is needed. And instead of pissing off directly back out into space, I head deeper into the station to the bridge. I find the detective near where I looted the captain, and send him running with a few bursts of my gun. I've a clip and a half of ammo left.
I make a small Cuban Pete joke to the station and call it quits. Escaping the station through medbay maint. I run into a couple of assistants. They are unarmed, and I'm not stopping for valids. I send them running with another spray of bullets and escape out into space.
The shuttle cockpit itself is breached, and so I get in quickly that way.
All that radiation exposure had mutated me, and left me mute. I couldn't even radio in to my teammates if any still lived. I cut my losses and evacuate with the disk back to the base. Take the time to make use of the holes and explore the snowfield outside the base, and then head back inside to celebrate with some Cuban Pete Spiced Rum.
Perhaps the best part was how when the credits rolled, OOC exploded with praise and amazement how I managed everything literally single-handed. Jokes were made at the captain's expense how he was being weighed down by the extra arms.
I was heralded as the One-Armed Bandit.
[youtube]XFldSKSCTkk[/youtube]
SYNDICATE MAJOR VICTORY

>sybil box memery on f-f-f-friday night motherfuckers
>armhulenn plays bee songs in pregame lobby
>everyone has bee fever
>spawn as assistant
>[NASTY ROARING AND CRUNCHING NOISES]
>[f1] I TRADE MY LING FOR BECOMING A MASSIVE BEE NAMED QUEEN BEE
>*bwoink* "DONE, INTO MAINT WITH YOU"
>scoot into maint
>delinged and gibbed
>put into bee with massive sprite
>go into halls
>crew is in awe of my greatness, they cant bee-lieve it
>borg is among the onlookers
>ask him to spawn bees on the holodeck
>HE ACTUALLY DOES IT
>absolutemadborg.jpg
>fly amongst my subjects
>try to attack the crew but my sprite is so big it covers the next tile over so i can only attack myself
>every attack plays bee song midis
>earrape.mp3
>ask borg to spawn more but he says he got in trouble
>shucks
>die to laserhos
>RIP
>*bwoink* "READY FOR BEE 2: ELECTRIC BEE-GALOO?!"
>[F1] dont you mean... PLAN BEE?
>*bwoink* jesus christ
>spawn in as zombie powder bee named zombee
>made super small
>stealthsting a bunch of the crew
>attacks play bee song dance remix
>dancingearrape.mp3
>borg somehow hits me with saw
>ROOD
>a bit later "the hive" makes a centcomm announcement
>"NAR-BEE APPROACHES"
>crew panics
>spawn in as a red bee with red glow
>stings light people on fire
>minor spree before killed
>rip
>go afk for a bit to practice guilty gear
>some other announcements about a slaughter bee-mon and other bee related badminnery but they all die before i can even find them
>zom-bee powder eventually reaches critical mass and shuttle is all zombies
>get to centcomm
>rave lights with DJ armhulenn at middle with meme strobe light machine
>half life dance music comes on
>THIS IS THRILEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER
>ice "no fun allowed" pax spawns a zlevel-wide explosion

rattle me bones

----
>[story how i saved station by doing rnd when nobody else would during blob round and barely getting x rays to the crew in time before blob won]

shoutout to jan VII too for dem minerals

---
>die early on box
>centcomm announcement: STONER ERT ON HIS WAY HE MAY BE ROGUE
>one ert named "lord of dance" comes in with dance meme machine
>sets it up in bar
>crew rocks out, even when some nig bombs them and they get set on fire and depressurized
>party relocates to bridge
>after a bit clown comes in, lubes, and destroys machine
>deadchat and livechat fill with demands for clown death
>lord of dance says gods tell him if clown dies a new meme dance machine will be created
>clown is hiding like a little bitch in a closet in atmos
>doctor eventually finds him
>saxxing as entire crew eventually stuns and lynches clown
>machine made as promised
>bridge party again
>get spawned in as a monkey named "spirit of dance"
>rock on garth
>party until LOD calls shuttle
>relocate to escape
>party reaches fever pitch, everything from borgs to xenos to flypeople are in on the nitelyfe
>
>suddenly round ends
>our faces when it was rev
>welp
>meme machine gains sentience and flies around escape, bashing everyone's shit and lighting them on fire
>nothing but crunching and screaming muffled by blaring dance music before game is reset

top memes

other highlights of the night were pimpin gang wins in chapel with mounted turret, struggling to get people on a summon rune after being left as a shard in a depressurized room for five minutes, and more. overall a great night of friday spessmen, good shit famalams

---

MimicFaux wrote: SYNDICATE MAJOR VICTORY

I was there, and it really was this epic. When you collapsed near the nuke either out of bloodloss or radiation, I was about to lose my shit. Also, fuck Brandon. Seriously, fuck him. He was the most useless operative of all, so much that he even failed to bomb the armory, because he didn't arm the bomb.

Deitus wrote:snip

delete this i'm a mean admin

>Wizard round
>Wizard is a memer and rolls summon events and guns
>Get shot to death quickly as shaft miner
>Later become ayy scientist
>Ready to ayy lmao it up
>Mindswap
>AYYS GET MINDSWAPPED TOO
>Now am catgirl scientist, with the same objectives
>Fuck
>Miraculously manage to find my agent, he's now a talking mime
>Meme around for a bit
>BRIGHT IDEA #1: butt in on the CMO doing a surgery and see if we can do an experimental dissection with human tools
>Not possible
>Pray to the gods for alien drapes but they just spawn a bunch of gibs underneath us
>Also the CMO gets mad and he and the detective crit the mime, almost crit me but I drill their ass
>Heal the mime, regroup
>Now what
>See sec dragging off an ayylium
>BRIGHT IDEA #2: save the fake ayys from security and see if they'll teleport us to our ship
>Race to the brig
>Somehow manage to kick security's ass except I'm near death
>Mime bro and a syndicate mediborg heal me up
>Look for ayys, no ayys, we rob the armory and wait
>Ayys come back but won't acknowledge us and in fact try to attack us
>"The emergency shuttle has docked with the station."
>Mime and I say fuck it and try to get to the shuttle
>MASS TELEPORT
>I'm still on the shuttle, mime is not
>Ayy teleports in and in a fit of salt I harmbaton him to death
>Call out to mime bro, he took the security pod
>Drag the dead ayy to the sec pod and escape with mime bro
>We both greentext for killing the imposter ayy

remember kids, never give up

i was the mime, good times my man, good times

>hos on box
>det and warden report in
>no cap
>have borg let me in so i can secure disk and spare
>wander around
>someone broke in and nabbed cap's laser
>find greyshirt fibers
>4 assistants on station according to records
>start spanish inquisition before some nig runs past shooting syringes
>chase after and tase, but he has adrenals and manages to hit me with a syringe
>heartburn nausia indegestion upset stomach diarrhea.gif
>i stagger to medbay where other nigs are crawling over chem
>they dont know symptoms and dont have viro access
>hey fam i can help
>go in and check
>liposide is a cure
>chemist whips some up in a jiff and distributes
>give that bitch a medal for saving me and a bunch of others
>on patroooooooooooooooooool
>jan michael VII says he killed the chap and he has a bunch of eswords
>offers them to me
>hey man you killed 'em, you keep 'em
>says he doesnt want them so warden and i are about to toss em into armory when warden makes star wars joke
>inspiration
>tell him we should reenact obi wan vs anakin on the bridge
>he agrees
>we call the crew for the show
>only a few show up (probably cuz meteors but oh well)
>chef and lizard come in
>lizard starts playing star wars theme on synthesizer
>time to make kino
>we quote the battle a bit
>"ITS ON"
>both running and clicking like autists
>i land a few hits
>he's down
>take his arm for movie dedication
>he gets up
>pic related happens (see dialogue)

>throw him in cyro and give him a prosthetic
>pax plays some song about big balls
>[f1] dude you missed our epic lightsaber fight
>*bwonk* ill show you epic
>"wait for it"
>"wait for it..."
>"wait for it..."
>"wait for it..."
>"wait for it..."
>"wait for it..."
>finally spear flies out of nowhere and embeds
>*bwoink* THERE WASNT THAT EPIC
>ok pax
>take it out while being pelted with a desk
>go to shuttle
>riding along to centcomm when CE goes full retard and shoots the warden with lasers
>we both take him down
>chemist who made cure earlier hacks his shit with axe
>WAIT NO STOP
>hand her esword
>USE THIS INSTEAD
>she thanks me and continues
>arrive at centcomm and meme a bit before pax makes a z-level wide explosion
>pax are you drunkminning again

10/10 shift, shoutouts to warden ian and sasha romanov for being bros

Rolled Changeling Clown, boring objectives about murdering and impersonating the CMO.
/pray Blessed Honkmother, can I trade my my ling-ness for two pie cannons?
You hear a voice in your head...I got you, fam
Fun-loving admins gave me two traitor-pie cannons and I tore up and down the halls dual-wielding them on harm intent for maximum spray. Absolutely blowing over everyone. The mime. The captain. Janitor, botany. security, Everyone. Then something magical happened. A lynch mob formed. I've had crew members chase me before, a salty bartender. a disgruntled mime. A freshly made bald chemist. But I've never been chased by a -crowd- of random crewmembers before as the clown. Oh lordy, it was incredible to see these pie-drenched trio battle their way through the pastry onslaught to try and disarm me of my cannons, occasionally succeeding, but only to either slip on the soap I was dragging, or accidentally pie each other with the hair-trigger of the cannon (giving me opportunity to grab the fallen cannon and then reacquire the second).

It was such a gut-splitting hilarity to see people try to fight their way towards me under a barrage of never ending pies, tripping over each other, that I actually had to hide out in an escape pod to take a breather. In the end, I got RNG'd on a disarm in a middle of a crowd, and security was able to dog pile on top of me where I was taken in crit to the brig where security read my rights to an unconscious and cuffed clown.

Sometime later, a pie-encrusted jani-lizard asked for my body and used it for some kind of ritual pyre.
The shuttle docks, the round ends, and I find my objectives had been rewritten as simply HONK!

The Traitor was successful!

So this happened a few rounds ago, and it was some of the funnest detective work I've had in a while. I was an assistant and ran around for a few minutes, meatspiked and put catears/a dress on Kurtis Wabbite after he suicided, y'know, normal assistant stuff. The AI accidentally cut comms for a bit but it went back up quickly. I run around for a while and then a guy with a prod tries hitting me. Earlier, I had killed a beepsky and taken it's baton so I stunned and cuffed him and brought him to the brig. When I get there, I hear of the virologist being murdered.

The guy who tried prodding me, Brian, and I both decided to help find out who did it. We investigate viro and find a blood trail that suddenly stops into a locker. Brian said he heard eswords around there earlier, so I figured we were looking for an esworder. The captain scanned for prints but couldn't find anything and viro's doors, three of them (metastation) were bolted open, but not emagged, which was odd. The crematorium also had blood in it, but no ashes. I ask the chappy if he saw anything and he names a scientist that me and the assistant flash and cuff.

At the brig, we sit in interrogation for a while with her. We had found an emag and a parapen, yet she refuses to admit she's a traitor. After a while I decide to let sec do with her what they want and walk off. I hear that someone emagged the borg but I pay little mind to it. I get back together with Brian and we talk and agree the scientist didn't do it. Brian thought the chaplain was lying but he was braindead so nothing came of that. At that point, I start thinking back... the no forensic evidence, the lack of ashes in the crematorium but still a blood trail, doors being bolted open with no emag, comms going off for a short while, the esword, the emagged borg... It all adds up. The AI was rogue and the borg was hacked!

I ask the borg and AI to let me card it and both dodge me. I get the captain to give me an ion rifle and an EVA suit and I move out to the minisat to card the AI with Brian. On the way there, I find something interesting- The AI and the borg pulling it. I immediately ion gun the borg and kill it, and bring the AI back to escape where it is carded and given to me. Sure enough, it's rogue. I ask it if it killed the viro, and it said it did not. I kept the AI on an intellicard and go to robotics where the borg was remade, unsynced, and then emagged by the roboticist. I get auged with a chainsaw and have the AI implanted in me. At this point me and the AI were pretty chill with each other. Ran around some more and then got prodded by the emagged borg, who seemed to be holding a grudge on me. The borgo killed me and took me to the toxins test area... where the viro was hidden in a locked locker. The borg then went through a huge adventure to get the card out and back into a core, which was funny. AI greentexted and I learned that I was right about the virologist, quite satisfying, that.

>be nuke op
>three ops only
>"oh no we have only three ops"
>the leader doesnt know how to op (first time)
>teach him how to do leader op stuff and how to gear up etc.
>its box, so taking out comms is pretty hard, but i still form a "I go in, take out AI with a bomb and dual E-Sword, after that everyone goes to station with me, take out comms with another bomb and BEELINE FOR DISK!" plan which is usual for almost every op round
>travel to station after half an hour of preparation
>take out AI in less than thirty seconds using syndibomb and big red button, followed up with DEsword
>ai didnt even have the time to call out ops, perfect
>rush to station through engi, heading for comms
>several engis and other people notice us, but we don't care, our group of three doesnt get hindered
>attempt to take out comms with a bomb but fail, because i think the bomb didnt quite reach the comm area
>rush to arrivals, where the disk was for some reason on the pinpointer
>as we are near arrivals, we fumble around trying to figure out where is the disk
>hear an explosion go off behind us
>me and the not-new guy go into arrivals maint, and find... CAPTAIN IN A LOCKER ( im not sure if he was braindead or what )
>instantly rush off into space to strip the captain of his disk
>ask the new guy "where is he"
>new guy doesn't respond
>"oh no"
>plant disk on solars, take the disk and ask the new guy to report, again
>me and the other dude suspect he has died and that explosion was either the result of his death, or what CAUSED his death
>we mourn the new guy, and fly off to our base
>we proceed to drink boose and eat pizza, celebrating our victory but mourning the new guy that has died in our mission
Syndicate Major Victory.

old story that i remembered out of nowhere, not sure if ive ever told it, dont even remember the full thing just this part but i only now realize how outstandingly lucky it was

>traitor
>sneaky shit
>busted
>chased down to atmos
>last stand
>take down maybe one but die quickly (i was new)
>very upset that i died (i was new)
>they bodybag my corpse and start dragging it out
>the bodybag takes long enough that by the time they start dragging vortexes appear (the kind that warp you around randomly)
>one spawns on my bodybag dragger
>he moves one tile and my bodybag goes through the portal
>appear in genetics
>by sheer chance geneticist opens the bag and clones me
>continue to traitor under a new name

what are the odds

PKPenguin321 wrote:old story that i remembered out of nowhere, not sure if ive ever told it, dont even remember the full thing just this part but i only now realize how outstandingly lucky it was

>traitor
>sneaky shit
>busted
>chased down to atmos
>last stand
>take down maybe one but die quickly (i was new)
>very upset that i died (i was new)
>they bodybag my corpse and start dragging it out
>the bodybag takes long enough that by the time they start dragging vortexes appear (the kind that warp you around randomly)
>one spawns on my bodybag dragger
>he moves one tile and my bodybag goes through the portal
>appear in genetics
>by sheer chance geneticist opens the bag and clones me
>continue to traitor under a new name

what are the odds

Did you immediately go buy a lottery ticket because you're the luckiest person alive?

If I was a geneticist, and a body suddenly appeared at my feet; I too would promptly do the bidding of the gods and bring that son of a bitch back to life

Two stories from today.

>Doc on Delta
>Chemist was shooting people with meth explosion syringes
>People flying around dead and/or limbless
>Start working with the rest of medical to get things managed, find new patients, process current patients, etc.
>Had lost my arm early on when the chemist shot the QM
>Things calm down so I request a doc to surgery
>No one comes
>I ask again
>No one
>Ask again
>Lo and behold, no one
>Upset I'm now an arm down, I decide to pray for a the Old Ones to send me a med student
>"You hear a voice in your head... we demand the payment of a burger and soda for this arrangement.
>Well shit
>Go to the kitchen, fashion up a burger, assistant brings me cola
>I grab a red crayon
>Set up a dining area in surgery with a red rune below it
>Set another rune below the surgical table, eat the crayon
>Preparations complete
>A med student is warped down, consumes his offering, and performs the ritual/surgery

"Medical Practices" as exercised through dark magic. Thanks Ausops for doing that one, it was amusing.

>Later, traitor doc
>Steal the nuke disk, oh boooyyyyy
>Buy an encryption key, MimicFaux also bought one. We communicate about goals and whatnot.
>See the captain a few times, decide to put off murder, so I go for Sleeping Carp instead of a poison kit/sleepy pen
>A few minutes later the captain radios over the syndicate channel
>OutedAlready.png
>He then recites the codewords
>Then the response words
>I sit there, thinking perhaps this is a comms agent? But comms agents don't get the codewords, and this would be completely against helping us
>Run into the cap later
>He escorts me and Mimic to the brig, gives us access, outfits us
>We get all our objectives done within the next 2 minutes
>Several individuals murdered, objects stolen, and conspiracies laid, we sit pretty as an organized traitor group
>CentComm starts sending messages to the crew informing them of a defunct mindshield implant
>Not too distant future, we're swarmed in the brig, cap and I defending the brig against the Nanotrasen Loyals
>He gets downed to the swarm, I try to move over to him to shake him up, but a cop manages to baton me in the struggle
>Both of us die, but Mimic manages to escape
>Cap had to die a glorious death
>That motherfucker died a glorious death indeed

Redtexted, but to be honest, having the privilege to work alongside a traitor captain for however long it lasted was a unique experience. It's been a long time since I've last interacted with one when we were both traitors, and both times have been a lot of fun.

>fluke op
>time for pod and macro implant
>leroooooooooooooy----
>*splat*
>mfw i landed on cap
>disk respawns in chapel
>right next to where other op buddies land the ship
>delta with minimum effort

what are the fucking odds i mean seriously