/tg/Station 13

Bottom post of the previous page:

> Yiff

> Yiff

Hahaha! The admin bus, glad Skorvold made it in the end.

Also shouldn't it have been Ahammer spamming .OOG's over and over? Maybe he's playing the second set, if Stillchr ever lets up.

Sticky and Ted finally have the virtual life they always wanted

>Talk to one of these slothful decadent jackass and try in vain to get them to do their damn jobs.

3) Yiff with Skorvold



"Hey Skorvy I'm sorry I was mean to you earlier. Let's tr-"
"HMPH" pouts Skorvold as he turns up his nose at An0n3.



"Okay well how about you check out this sweet laser pen instead?"
"OH FUCK YES" cries Skorvold.



Ultimately it's all for nought. Skorvold refuses to let us touch them, acting dramatic and putting on the air of a scorned lover. Their thoughts turn to Hornygranny, who has taken this opportunity to fuck with the ETI console. God dammit!



We shove them out of the way and take our rightful seat again, ready to get back to worrraaaaaAAAAAAATTT THE FUCK IS THAT!?



Outside on the 'bus yard the avatar of the Goat Lord drops a basket of Goat Gifts and produces a moodlet that indicates he has begun to fall in love with us.



A strange roaring sound pierces the sky, a great light shines down from the Goat Heavens.



With a huge crash a Goat Portal appears promising adventures in the Goat Dimension. Fuck this. There's work to be done. We need to get back to Space House and check up on the other tenants. I absolutely refuse to go down there and investigate.

PERMISSIONS REDUCED
[PERMISSION: BADMIN]
------------------------------
AVAILABLE COMMANDS:

1) Possess [mob]
2) [G^&N THE$#@ AN$% INVES#$$^ATE]

go down there and investigate

Possess P&S. The problem started with them, they probably fucked something up somehow.

Violaceus wrote:possess Skorvold

That command doesn't work on other admins.

EndgamerAzari wrote:Possess P&S. The problem started with them, they probably fucked something up somehow.

I keep trying but the computer only makes a faint hissing sound and then dies. When I reboot it, we're back to where we started.

Pick someone else for now. Maybe we can fix that or find out what's causing it later.

Posses Robustin, use your atmosia expertise to tinker with some shit. Or can you not do that in this one?

throw Skorvold into the portal


actually, dress Skorvold up as a tiny annoying goat first, then throw him into the portal

Possess the mime

>possess mime
>turn toward doorway
>Space-Mime Continuum looks as if a wall is in front of them!
>lay on couch, bask in angry glares of other residents from doorway

Possess whoeverthefuck our dog was.

PAS

Balut wrote:Possess whoeverthefuck our dog was.

Am I that easily forgotten? ;_;

I BET HG DID THIS, MURDER HIM VIOLENTLY

Kraso wrote:I BET HG DID THIS, MURDER HIM VIOLENTLY

I'm fairly certain this has zero probability of a negative outcome unless you die, An0n.

>Possess Space-Mime Continuum



Jumping to Space-Mime we find ourselves inexplicably in the children's section of the local library, enjoying a picture book about zoo animals. We have no recollection of how we got here or why.



To our right, Erin Wake and Hedwig Algebra share a bench and are also engrossed in reading their own books. Erin is pouring over ancient illustrations of sexual anatomies while Heddy pretends to read her own book and sneaks glances at Erin's.



We get up and patrol for mischief. It appears that even more of Space House is hanging around. We do only have the one car, so perhaps we decided on one place to go for the afternoon? Robustin wanders around the reference section while Mekhi patrols for anyone speaking above a hushed whisper.



Just for shits I quickly check the ETI for the whereabouts of the other members, just to see who might be up to what. It seems that Glover and Shoves have gone downtown to get "all up in the club". Unfortunately for them it's still early afternoon and "the club" is fucking closed.



Back at the house poor Peoplearestrange is locked outside with nothing to do and no food or water. She paws at the side of the house and barks at the window, but nobody is home. The death clock ticks down a few more seconds.



Returning to Space Mime, we try to flex our mime magic and create invisible walls but nothing works. Fearing our spiritual connection to the great Silence is severed, we start inscribing various runes and graffiti charms around the outside of the library.



This placement seems really ballsy but nobody seems to care while she sprays a great orange rune down right in plain sight. I keep receiving a moodlet but I cannot discern its purpose. Either Space Mime is growing a mohawk, turning into a character from Gurren Lagann, or acquiring some kind of wanted level. We satisfy one of our short term goals of vandalizing a bunch of shit and get some happy points.



We notice through the window Oldman is getting lectured by another oldman. "Books!" he says, and opens his hands like something is exploding. Oldman frowns and says nothing in reply.



Upstairs things are heating up. Erin appears to be trying to lure Mekhi over by playing the helpless damsel, lounging on the floor of the library. Mekhi is too busy keeping overwatch on the library lobby. His elevated position gives him 270 degrees of situational awareness and maximum potential kinetic energy.



We claim this library for Silence. It's fitting, really. The one building in the city you're not supposed to talk inside is slowly becoming covered in the marks of the mime.



Elsewhere PAS has somehow broken into the home? I have no idea how she could've possibly gotten inside but she still is all alone with no food and nothing to do. Only now she's trapped in the dark. Great thinking, fox.



We watch as the sun dwindles and everyone clears out of the library to head home. We linger a little longer to finish up another large rune at the base of the steps. It's nearly impossible to enter the library without walking over one of our marks now. Perhaps our gods will bless us and return our powers or convert more people in the library to mimes.



With everyone home we begin to concont some "juice" for ourselves. It's the best way to relax after a long day of vandlism and worship of otherwordly entities. We sip our drink and watch as Oldman and Mekhi have a brief argument over who gets to use the bathroom first (Oldman wins) and watch skeptically as Pushes and Shoves attempts to prepare a meal.

[PERMISSION: BADMIN]
------------------------------
AVAILABLE COMMANDS:

1) Possess [mob]
2) Stop Pushes and Shoves
3) [FREEFORM]

how do you even say "mekhi"
is it "mech-hi" or "ma-kie"?
or "mek-hee"??

I think "ma-kai" is right.

There's an actor Mekhi Phifer and whenever I've heard his name pronounced it's that way. Ma-kai Fife-r

I was saying is "mek-hai" before but that's not right.

No, let him potentially burn the house down, it is more exciting that way.
I also love how completely dysfunctional these people are in a routine trip to the library, complete with Erin being slutty and the mime being a shit. All it is missing is the librarian screaming porn at everyone and it would be just like home.

1) Posses Oldman Robustin

An0n3 wrote:I think "ma-kai" is right.

There's an actor Mekhi Phifer and whenever I've heard his name pronounced it's that way. Ma-kai Fife-r

I was saying is "mek-hai" before but that's not right.

well i know a dude in real life named maki and you say it "muh-kai" which i assume is the same as what youre saying

I thought a maki was a species of monkey.

Not sure about Mekhi, though, or how you pronounce it.

Wyzack wrote: 1) Posses Oldman Robustin

Seconded!

Still, at some point Pushes has to table someone, just wouldn't be right not to.

I'm totally just out of touch with the spacemans community, blue fox thingperson. Also, I totally say it "Meh-key".

What the fuck was Pushes and Shoves doing while everyone was at the library? Whatever possess Robustin.

What does Pushes and Shoves do when nobody is looking?
What kinds of thoughts run through his head?

Maybe we'll eventually find out.

+1 for Possess Pushes-and-Shoves.
That shifty scaly motherfucker is up to something. We're gonna come back to the house to find water puddles everywhere and like 6 tables.

An0n3 wrote:What does Pushes and Shoves do when nobody is looking?
What kinds of thoughts run through his head?

^ HA! Pretty much what I imagine.

Putting TABLES on to PEOPLE?

That's ridiculous.

3) go to the goat lord. then kill hg. the kingdom is yours to rule now.

Possess Reed, I want to see what happens at teh club

Updates tomorrow. Get any last minute votes in now.

>Possess Oldman Robustin



Thrilling.



Damned dog pissed on the porch. Nobody cares about keeping this place clean but me. Everyone happy to live in filth. Not us.



Filthy tail-dragger managed to finish cooking some food without killing everyone. Small miracle.



Other residents hitting it off. Might be able to use that against them later. Mekhi tries creeping up on the pussay. Good luck with that.



Tastes like shit but filling. Could be worse. Like that time the escape shuttle got knocked off course by meteors. Drifted in space for three months. Left the station almost full. Found us with only 4 left. We were the only sane one. So they said.



Everyone leaves their dishes around but we're compelled to clean it up. We're the only one here who cares.



Heddy's back. Don't know how we missed her. She's so helpless nobody keeps their eyes on her. The perfect cover. Smarter than she looks.



Visit the neighbors. Watch them through their window. Nice couple. Nice stuff. They look happy together. That wont last long.



Nice car. Better than our car. Looks expensive. Wonder what the husband does for a living. How much he paid for the car. How much he'd pay for his wife.



We whisper promises of things to come in his window while he does some late night work. He doesn't notice us but he hears the words. Gets up and runs into his bedroom to check on his wife. Take comfort in the human form underneath the blankets while you can. Life is precious. Time is short.



Reed is learning alchemy. The arms race is starting. Broke in and stole the neighbors telephone while they slept. We're setting things in motion too, Reed.



Idiot lizard is up all night jumping on the trampoline. Don't know what kind of thoughts run through his head. Try looking on the computer for personal's adds. Used gardening equipment. Nothing. Reed plants some basic ingredients outside along the front of the house. Need to learn which ones are poisonous. Need to know what he's doing. Need to get some sleep. Stay sharp.



Well that was weird. Oldman goes to sleep while Reed and Shoves stay up late. The two of them seem to have boundless reserves of energy and spend it beating the shit out of eachother with pillows. I'm surprised nobody else wakes up and yells at them, but they do this for hours.



Jesus that face.



Peoplearestrange is feeling the effects of neglect. She starts tearing into some of the furniture, savaging one of the cheap ass couches we have. We need to start urging people towards finding some income otherwise we're going to run out of steam very soon.



Reed and Shoves run outside to toss the ol' pigskin around. Nice form Reed you nerd. I should point out it's like somewhere between 2am and 3am I think. Whatever these two did downtown while everyone else was at the library got them supercharged with energy.



Uh oh? Is Space-Mime starting to make a move? Now me the pussay creepin' up on me. Will it be for murder or romance? Nice nightie, by the way.

I should point out, since we're rapidly jumping between people so much, that if we want to guide someone's actions we have to stay in them and then affect their behavior. We can't Possess someone and then immediately start directing them around. [FREEFORM] actions will only apply to the person we're currently in control of, in this case Oldman Robustin. If we want to do something as someone else, we have to spend time posessing them first. Unless something changes or I manage to upgrade this ETI.

[PERMISSION: BADMIN]
------------------------------
AVAILABLE COMMANDS:

1) Possess [mob]
2) [FREEFORM]
#) [A$K $&&STI@N]

yiff

Old Man Robustin:
>Rise. Perform usual paranoid routine. Seek employment to further goal of arming oneself against them myriad tyrannies afoot in this shithole.

Possess Mekhi, crack down on fun and after hours behavior

EndgamerAzari wrote:Old Man Robustin:
>Rise. Perform usual paranoid routine. Seek employment to further goal of arming oneself against them myriad tyrannies afoot in this shithole.

oldman will carry this space house to victory

Make Oldman loot us some cool swag.

Also Christ that face.

Also Mime's face. It looks like the fuckin' clown thing from Five Nights at Freddy's II,

Before the update commences I just wanted to share this magical screenshot with everyone. Anyway...


>[STEAL]



We are awoken from our slumber when Pushes-and-Shoves triggers the NT Station Alert system. The PA system in our room blasts a bunch of shitty techno at us and we stumble out of bed to swear at the assholes who built this thing.



Oldman cases the neighborhood. Across the street is a nice-enough looking place. One occupant. Adult male. This should be lucrative and give us some practice before our magnum opus.



We ring the doorbell and are somewhat surprised to be greeted by the homeowner. He must work out of the home. We shake hands and invite ourselves inside.



The exterior was decieving. There's little of value in this squalor. We consider different methods of inflicting pain on this man for wasting our time.



We light a fire in his fireplace, but before we can drop any combustibles next to it the man runs over and shoos us away. If we're going to burn down his home we'll need to try something else. Or make sure he's unconscious first.



It's a shame, once you've seen a fire in zero gravity every fire becomes a thing of nostalgic beauty. We will see this place burn.



We eye his stove and offer to cook him breakfast. Opening his fridge and setting out the ingredients before he can refuse. His discontent with us bubbles over and he threatens to call the police if we don't leave. Smart, but also very stupid. He's made the list.



We take a moment to root through his trash, looking for anything to ruin him with. All we find are a few tubs of discarded ice cream and his recyclables. Model citizen. We'll be the giant that steps on his model home. All in good time.



It's too early in the day to steal yet, so we look for a daytime job. A local criminal organization is scouting for talent. Perfect. They meet down at a local factory most days of the week.



We kill time training. We'll need to be strong for some of the work that's ahead. Time is on our side.



Stop training for a drink. Think bitterly about our past. It gets us low. We drink more juice. We feel better again.



We take a short nap and visit our newest friend again. We watch him sleep through his bedroom window then ring the doorbell anyway.



We barge inside. He makes for his telephone but we've already lifted it. I tear some curtains off his wall. He fumbles for his cellphone. We're about to beat him with the curtain rod when we hear the operator for 911 pick up. Checkmate. We've fumbled this one. We run out the door and into the night.



Down the street someone has left a car parked in a dark lot behind the grocery store.



We make it ours.



Emboldened we spot another unattended car.



We snake the lock on this one too. Easy couple thousand simoleons I'd bet. We'll have to try to learn the whereabouts of a local chopshop at our first day on the job tomorrow. Two cars we'll have to park in the backyard tonight.



Our heart is still racing from the excitement but our lack of sleep hits us hard. We retire for the night, two cars, and a new job richer. The man across the street hates us and I'm sure the local police would like to talk to us about a few things but we'll lay low or just blame the juice if we have to.

[PERMISSION: BADMIN]
------------------------------
AVAILABLE COMMANDS:

1) Possess [mob]
2) [FREEFORM]

Holy shit this is so fucking awesome

Possess Reed and do some good deeds to counteract the bad karma that Space House is accumulating.

Posses dog(PAS)
Find something edible around here

Not sure if anyone has noticed but I've been putting music where appropriate for the post in the title of the updoot. Your reading enjoyment/immersion might improve somewhat. It's there for framing.

Continue to be Old Man Robustin.

Robust that scrub across the street.

Freeform: Embrace your life of organised crime. And plot your way to the top.

freeform: go grab the damn gift from the goat lord already, nerd

XSI wrote:Posses dog(PAS)
Find something edible around here

*Fox

And I think I just peed myself. This is gold!

2. Freeform: Oldman Robustin might need to ensure Mekhi knows who is the real boss in the house.