Nice tune, real easy

peoplearestrange · Mon Jan 19, 2015 10:59 pm

Bottom post of the previous page:

miggles wrote:>there will never be a season 2

Of firefly?
;_;7

Ricotez · Post by **Ricotez** » Mon Jan 19, 2015 11:06 pm #60596

peoplearestrange wrote:
miggles wrote:>there will never be a season 2
Of firefly?
;_;7

of symbionic titan

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Mon Jan 19, 2015 11:16 pm #60601

peoplearestrange wrote:
miggles wrote:>there will never be a season 2
Of firefly?
;_;7

no, shut the fuck up

of that ^

Ricotez · Post by **Ricotez** » Mon Jan 19, 2015 11:27 pm #60608

s-shut up

I believe in Nozaki-kun ;_;

nsos · Post by **nsos** » Mon Jan 19, 2015 11:43 pm #60611

if you ask me what my all-time favorite jpeg image on the internet i’ve ever seen was it’d be this. i have had sleepless nights thinking about this photo, i have considered writing papers on this photo dozens of pages long. there is more to this photo than meets the eye and it invokes emotions in me that range from incredible humor to crippling sadness, from tremendous disgust to absolute universal oneness and zen. i don’t expect everyone to understand and see what i see in this photo but i just want to share what this means to me. i’ve seen plenty of interesting and thought-provoking things in my life on the net, but this one has to be the absolute highest gold standard for my life thus far.

the first thing to understand about this image is the context. this image was taken from here, a study done to compare how expensive many liquids are by the gallon.

here are a few basic points to consider. keep in mind, this only covers 10% of it.

01. look closely (zoom in if you have to) on the label on the bag. read aloud what it says.

02. knowing what you know about point 1, it can be interpreted as a ziplock bag of children’s blood.

03. there is no way human blood is stored or contained in a ziplock bag.

04. why is there a label on this bag? was the label actually a document from the hospital, or did she make it herself?

05. this is a gallon of children’s blood. how many children contributed to this bag?

06. was it a single child? was it taken out all at once or were there intervals in the siphoning process?

07. obviously taking out this much blood immediately would kill a small child.

08. there is no humanly possible way that a bunch of random mixed up children donated blood into one container, even if they all had the same blood type.

09. how did this woman get access to children’s blood? did she move it from a real container to a ziplock? why did she do that?

10. it looks like she had some problems transferring the blood (by the looks of the top of the bag). does she not care that children’s blood has been spilled on her floor?

11. is it her house? where is she? look at the surroundings. beige walls, a bookshelf to the right, wood table to the left with a gallon of paint. she is clearly not at a hospital.

12. it’s nothing short of an “”“”“”aesthetic”“”“” that this woman is wearing a blood red sweater and red lipstick. i have never seen someone more successfully rock a flannel shirt underneath a sweater with the collar popped and the bottom not tucked in.

13. human blood can’t just be tossed in the back seat of your ford taurus and driven home from the hospital to take a photo. it has to be stored in a freezer.

14. so this woman has to have connections with the medical industry to procure human blood, did she get fired from her position? was she arrested? why was this never on the news?

15. it is a bag of red wine

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 3:35 am #60672

[youtube]JpO1H79Co0w[/youtube]

Feretal · Post by **Feretal** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 4:39 am #60681

Good I prefer red wine over white anyways

And that hairstyle and clothing are terrifying

danno · Post by **danno** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 4:43 am #60682

god damnit

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 7:22 am #60708

E: FUCK THAT SHIT - V

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 8:22 am #60719

Whoisthere · Post by **Whoisthere** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 8:45 am #60723

you ever been to a turkish prison

TheWiznard · Post by **TheWiznard** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 8:45 pm #60916

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UA_L3IJ3NHQ

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Tue Jan 20, 2015 10:27 pm #60937

[youtube]WXQCo9fLYWI[/youtube]

Rolan7 · Post by **Rolan7** » Wed Jan 21, 2015 2:45 am #61056

I remember thinking that the "Foes" feature notified you whenever one of your favorite hates posted, so you could snipe at them more efficiently.

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Wed Jan 21, 2015 2:07 pm #61202

[youtube]aS9TgoMfnQ4[/youtube]

Munchlax · Post by **Munchlax** » Wed Jan 21, 2015 8:50 pm #61291

you suck at shitposting you bitcvh

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Wed Jan 21, 2015 8:54 pm #61292

geilebeer is like the only good moderator lmao

peoplearestrange · Thu Jan 22, 2015 10:38 am

fuck you im the best

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Fri Jan 23, 2015 4:13 pm #61961

butt plans.

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Fri Jan 23, 2015 11:48 pm #62103

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Sat Jan 24, 2015 4:51 am #62180

Ricotez · Post by **Ricotez** » Sat Jan 24, 2015 3:14 pm #62283

that took me several seconds to spot

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Sun Jan 25, 2015 11:15 am #62638

every fucking meme

callanrockslol · Tue Jan 27, 2015 2:23 am

Kraso wrote:every fucking meme

Its about creating context.

nsos · Post by **nsos** » Tue Jan 27, 2015 1:06 pm #63404

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Wed Jan 28, 2015 5:58 pm #63833

(USER WAS BANNED FOR GREYTIDING)

Post by **Vekter** » Wed Feb 11, 2015 9:09 am #68176

omg grey tide han be

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Wed Feb 11, 2015 1:44 pm #68203

Vekter wrote:omg grey tide han be

there is no stopping the griffing hordes
we've already been taken over
just assimilate into your grey blankness

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Wed Mar 11, 2015 8:48 pm #74983

Someone deleted this thread.

I have used my magic powerz to restore it. Griff on.

EndgamerAzari · Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:46 pm

if there were two guys on the moon and one killed the other with a rock would that be fucked up or what

nsos · Post by **nsos** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:11 am #75029

just my opinion but fuck the moon

nsos · Post by **nsos** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:12 am #75031

fuck mars fuck space

EndgamerAzari · Thu Mar 12, 2015 3:54 am

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 11:23 am #75086

nsos wrote:just my opinion but fuck the moon

i heard moon rock is pretty nice and soft

Drynwyn · Post by **Drynwyn** » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:38 pm #75098

An0n3 wrote:Someone deleted this thread.

I have used my magic powerz to restore it. Griff on.

the griff
it is good

EndgamerAzari · Fri Mar 13, 2015 5:24 pm

http://news.sky.com/story/1444513/docs- ... transplant

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Sat Mar 14, 2015 1:23 am #75463

there should be a gamer version of pawn stars called pwn stars where they collect copies of battletoads and find ways to kill prank callers from /v/ with them

EndgamerAzari · Tue Mar 31, 2015 10:24 pm

We really should try to re-quarantine the shitposting to this thread

callanrockslol · Tue Mar 31, 2015 10:41 pm

Never.

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Tue Mar 31, 2015 10:57 pm #79675

EndgamerAzari wrote:We really should try to re-quarantine the shitposting to this thread

it would be pretty time consuming for the mods to put every single post on the forums into one thread

Ricotez · Post by **Ricotez** » Wed Apr 01, 2015 2:04 pm #79804

the board is our shitpost thread

EndgamerAzari · Wed Apr 01, 2015 6:41 pm

Life is worth living!

Spoiler:

miggles · Post by **miggles** » Thu Apr 02, 2015 3:40 am #79889

EndgamerAzari wrote:Life is worth living!

Spoiler:
April Fools'.

nsos · Post by **nsos** » Thu Apr 23, 2015 3:12 am #83503

There’s a white cube of regret on my tongue. Morsels of divine spit wade through my black bile; hollow children rush through the wind as my teeth die and turn to gold. My Delta flight halts mid-air and I look down at the canyons, stunned. Jet-engines whoosh through my blood; crayfish scurry towards me singing songs of the dead. The moon dropped down from the firmament and landed on Varet Street next to the Church of God. I knew this was a sign that my encounter with the Tao was to take place soon. But I have forgotten this fact every moment of my life. The memory sometimes glimmers like a face reflected by a sequin blouse: shattered. I gave myself to another soul whom, since there is no time, I’ve known for all eternity, and, myself, am. A corona of trumpets, trombones, cornets, conch shells, French horns and tubas was woven around us into a floral wreath, braided brass blooming and spitting pollen into the sky. The entire universe turned our way and watched as we erected a maypole for all creation to whirl ‘round. We walked across the ashes of Bushwick searching for the right condom – meanwhile text was flowing through the channels of my system. My dick began to swell. A basement opened up under my ribs and a phoenix peeked his head through the trap door. Jaded, I fell to the concrete. The pain was like a full-on thwack, like a Mack truck. My ribs were shattered; I lay there and felt a pool of my own blood creep gently around my jaws. Unable to move, for the first time I saw my essence. Floating, bio-luminescent in the dark; faint cyan, ovular - my very core; the five lines of code that have been whispering to me all my life. The cicadas that have swarmed through my grass. The patina wrapped around the statue of my sexual depravations. I don’t remember any more – something very important happened right then, and I swore to myself I’d never forget the feeling, the illuminaton (I remember the oath like it was yesterday). But now here I am. I know nothing – I’ve never known anything. I swerve through rails of anticipation into cul-de-sacs of loss. Soul on edge, lashing myself with leatherette paddles labelled “Remorse”, “Dread”, “Work”. Stirring a giant cauldron filled with the embryos of a future Pegasus. I wash all the windows, but I’m doing it just to make a buck. I heave a giant rock at the bear just because the girls are watching. I cut open a lime and spray its juices onto the seams of being, hoping that their threads will weaken, so that I can – one last time - see the face of the God who has abandoned me once and for all, in advance, but in whom my faith has only become more resolute. I sing holy matrimony as I dance across the hull of my frozen airplane - sitting still, suspended in the sky! I yearn for a verdant prize between the legs of a sacred woman! I moan with the frenzy of the great OM who anoints every thistle with his ruby tears! I choke a helpless child; I am depraved. I smack my own face as I writhe in the dark, cursing my recent decision. I beg for time’s snake to tear through its own scales like the jaws of big, rabid dog. I throw myself into 12-step work. I call Oprah Winfree on the telephone and threaten her through the side of my mouth.

I DJ at a failed afterparty, hoping to advance my career as a post-community socialite. I leap across the Atlantic and arrive at a cheap warehouse space in Berlin. I send my dead grandmother an email about my accomplishments. I hold seven planets in my left hand. My eyes are two golden nuggets. Saturn’s rings are my belt. My wake is much larger than that of ordinary mortals due to my preternatural talents, elite education, devastating good looks, chronic self-obsession. I sink ships that I can’t even see – sorry! My admirers sublimate their lust for me, showering me with valiant acts of gleaming chivalry – later they curse themselves for their cowardice as they squirt their yellow seeds into a Styrofoam cup. Prancing around the fields of Minneapolis, I pay my dues to the Native Americans who traded me their spears for a kiss. I shake up the art world just by preaching the gospel of Jesus Christ to a few unsuspecting collectors. I leap from my Delta flight and rush through the air, flipping through the clouds in a glad spree! Pleased with myself, I turn around the corner of Forsyth, and I see an albino pigeon perched on a small jade tree that has been planted in the middle of the sidewalk. The bird cocks its head at me, and all the blood leaves my body. Barely able to move, I lean towards it – just close enough to hear the pigeon softly deliver this speech –
You are not who you think you are.

Turn to the craw; there, you’ll find hyacynths of illumination

Thank you for yesterday

Crazes shatter the big mud that skulks through you

Do you feel this?

The bird’s tone of voice triggers an uncomfortable memory. Here’s what happened: A vast vortex of pain gnashed through the nerves in my shoulder. A shard of poison flame licked me with daggers of ice. Haggard wasps shredded one another to pieces for the chance to shit their venom on one of my remaining patches of skin. I flailed literally across the entire continent of North America: my skin became a grey rag, ever whitening as my bones screamed “Surrender” with ever-mounting amplitude. MIDI notes locked together in chains of cyber-DIY mischief and choked the lowest stretch of my cochlea with a fuming partita of Gaia-madness. Crying in my loudest voice, twirling through the bitterest stratospheric cold, I shrieked with a gargantuan heave:

Pigeon, you have chosen me

Halt the manufacture of corduroy

Please and Thank You

Ashtray, please.

Dr. Bronners isn’t safe anymore

Whore of Babylon, facing police guns: big black violence scrys beyond my lonesome crystal
Pigeon, I apologize
And just as my mouth opened up around the sun, just as I prepared to swallow the lux aeterna pattering across our galactic slashdot: the maternal vines of my youth appeared in my hands, around my neck, wrapped around my waist. The spectral hues of Great God shuddered through all the sockets in my apartment. A woman appeared – bold, powerful heart, unflagging, a leader. She issued a few orders to the celesta, and the bowels of the earth closed. She wrote a relatively standard Rx, but the handwriting alone was enough to stop the economy. She added colors to my rainbow – impossible to see. She delegated tasks perfectly and cordoned off the entire globe into a single, shining legion of LOVE. Rock bands swung around like bandanas with yipping celebration. Goths volunteered to go under the knife of tattoo removal. Pressing forward, the small fragile community began to get serious. And then: and then!
Issuing a lump of asignfying novelty – suddenly – ineluctably – Being withdrew as though nothing had ever happened.
The lump of asignifying novelty lay there like the caul of a dead newborn. What now? What do we make of this encounter? Who can we share this with besides one another? How long will it last? Will the sparrows sing the same song tomorrow? Will the sex always be this good? Could there be more beauty in life than most suppose? Can love heal all things? Can two people join together in solidarity? Can they sidestep self-sabotage? Can the trees cry? Can little wounded hearts beat with tenderness? Can memories from our teen years prophecy anything? Is the borrowed metronome a reliable clock source? Is the gray an appropriate backdrop to the pink? What will happen to her body? Who am I?

I grafted my branches onto a tree of innuendo and poured my self a cup of tepid shame. The pom-pom of my night cap sank down as I sat next to the fire and contemplated all the ways that my defenses sully my soul’s dove. I bowed my head to Ann Lee, my true Friend. I clinked glasses with Slavoj Zizek, my comrade. I decided to keep quiet as waves of Kabbalah drifted through me, and, once more, I resolved to offer my intentions to the vector of my true soul – the soul to whom I belong. I wound up all the sarcasm that has ever blackened my heart and coiled in into a ring. I swore to live and emanate with gentle naivete. I cast the ring overboard, just I heard a man on a tall tower screaming something about an iceberg.

nsos · Post by **nsos** » Thu Apr 23, 2015 3:13 am #83504

Johnson is a rhinoceros with no horns. He is unable to fight with the other rhinos and consequently cannot find a mate. One day a serpent slithers up his leg and onto his nose, standing up on his tail. “I will be your horn,” says the serpent. “No,” said Johnson, “you are to soft”. The snake coils up and enters Johnson. “I am no longer soft,” he says as he gathers around Johnson’s intestines. Johnson feels invaded as the snake coils tighter and tighter. The snake cries, “You didn’t want a horn, did you? Well, would you like some bowels?" Johnson curses his luck and pounds the earth with his feet.

Lilac is walking in a field. A pretty rose calls out, "Lilac! Be careful. A ghost is following you." Lilac heeds the advice of the rose. She continues her journey on hands and knees instead of walking. Next to her elbow, a ladybug says to her, "It’s a good thing you’ve come down here. It’s not safe out in the open. There are ghosts”. “So I’ve heard,” said Lilac. The ladybug added, “Just be careful of the hands that come out of the earth. I wouldn’t want you to be grabbed." Hearing this, Lilac decided to tumble rather than crawl. She tumbled over a stone and broke her ribs. “It’s a good thing you’ve been tumbling”, said the stone. There are many dangers on the outside. I’d suggest you stay here until your rib heals. And so Lilac remained by the rock’s side for the rest of her life, because her rib would not heal.

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Thu Apr 23, 2015 4:29 am #83513

Just how high are you right now?

nsos · Post by **nsos** » Thu Apr 23, 2015 12:29 pm #83549

DemonFiren wrote:Just how high are you right now?

namaste :^)

Drynwyn · Post by **Drynwyn** » Thu Apr 23, 2015 4:52 pm #83605

Most likely HIGH as KEITH RICHARD'S BALLS.

Ricotez · Post by **Ricotez** » Fri Apr 24, 2015 10:59 am #83789

Post by **Vekter** » Sat May 02, 2015 8:05 am #85274

EndgamerAzari wrote:We really should try to re-quarantine the shitposting to this thread

Report it then

Post by **Vekter** » Sat May 02, 2015 8:06 am #85275

Like holy shit how do you expect me to quarantine it if I don't know where the fuck it 9s