Tales from Spaaaaace!
This is a story from last night that as far as awesome goes maybe strays closer to 'or something like it'.
Late night basil round, meta station. Mid range population of about 16-20, fair number for 2am. Extended. I decided to run one of my admin gimmicks, 'The Nervous Syndicate Agent', a well meaning, but generally bumbling Syndie who shows up to either steal the disk that bad captains forget to secure, or sets up a shop in maint to sell to disenfranchised Nanotrasen employees; Usually it ends hilariously when security gets in their valids as he triggers his implant to 'avoid capture', sometimes prematurely. Tonight, it's the latter and I park myself in that secure storage room between cargo and perma and setup shop. I do a little remodelling and lay down red floor plating, put up some posters and stock the racks and crates with a variety of goods. Everything from bombs and implants, to various gun bundles and clothing options. I keep the insignificant stuff on the counter next to the window with the more valuable/dangerous stuff in the back, but still on display. Finally, I tweak the access on the door and windoor to syndicate access and give myself a PDA and a lawyer cartridge.
This is always my favourite part of the gimmick. The initial sales pitch. I message everyone at once, "Tired of security spoiling your fun? Upset that Nanotrasen hasn't paid you in weeks? The Syndicate has what you want! Come find out shop in maintenance and join the winning team! Cash only."
It's great, I have the AI immediately message me about harm potential, medbay asking for implants and inquiring after healing equipment, engineers and cargo tech's looking at guns and the science guys like, "all of it. Give me those sweet tech levels" I reply to them as fast as I can.
=> AI: We carry a selection for silicon units as well that excel in harm prevention. Garuentee your borgs laws 1/3 with stun upgrades, and x-Ray camera upgrades for yourself! Never again let harm go undetected!
=> Engineer: Sure thing, we've lots to choose from, come on down and see if we have anything that catches your eye.
=> Security: Sorry, you have the wrong number, this is Space Papa John's Pizza, we are uh... Currently closed right now. Please call again in two - three business days. Beeeeep!
=> Cargo: Yes, we can do that. It'll cost you about 5k in straight dosh, or 5 gold bars.
An engineer wanders in, I greet him awkwardly, having given myself the stutter mutation. He asks about the shop and if there was anything I wanted from the bar, I tell him a syndicate bomb would be great! He heads off.
My next customers aren't quite so accommodating as the full security force of the station storms into my shop. The HoS, two officers, the captain, and I believe either the HoP or the detective. Guns drawn, tele-scopic shields deployed, and I'm just waiting for the disabler barrage to put me down.
Nervous Syndicate Trader stammers: "O-o-oh, hi t-there... C-can I help y-you?"
An uncomfortable silence where one of the officers tests the normally free-access windoor. At last the captain pipes up, "how much for some adrenal implants?" And I let out a breath of relief. After that, I was in constant business, and my shop was 'sanctioned' under the command staff. The crew were pretty good about the whole thing! No one tried to steal my stock, and no one got mad when my prices were higher than what they currently could afford.
All this while I'm conducting my business the AI is trying to orchestrate someone to be his hands and deliver the combat upgrade for the xray vision. He has a guy whose willing to make the delivery, but has been dicking around in medbay waiting on a healing virus that is taking forever. Poor AI just wants to enjoy malf powers under Asimov. An assistant comes in with some gold bars, the defacto currency I'm using, and he gets a stetchkin he's super pleased about. The captain comes by and tries to barter with the box of medals. After a few attempts (God bless the stammer mutation) I convey that I won't just take it as a flat payment, and want to see the medals. I value them for their metal worth, and tell the captain he's got to at least provide some diamonds for the equipment they want.
Around this time owegeno is doing his own event, I can see him piecing together the objectives in the admin log. Some suave business lady trying to purchase the station.
I'm feeling pretty good with my event; I haven't been lynched, the crew are interested, and the miners are being valued for more than just science fodder. That is until one of them fucked up.
Admin log: An Ash Drake has been moved to station Z-level via mining shuttle!
I amuse the ghosts watching by having a panic attack inside my shop as fire rains from the sky just a short ways away. (My store is full of explosives, and one bad RNG and it all blows up) but the crew bands together and manages to slay the beastie! Unfortunately, the battle was not without cost. The AI's courier for the combat upgrade got killed in the fight, and they were having trouble finding anyone else who cared enough to deliver the upgrade. After all that time waiting, the poor bastard gets killed a screen away from my shop. I make a few more deals, the captain trades their crown for a few mid-tier implants. Business is good for the Syndicate! At least for me it is, owegeno's merchant isn't having much luck buying the station. And as their sales tactics get more aggressive, resistance to the idea continues to mount. Eventually, a mercenary team is called in to forcefully take the station, and my trader decides that situation is getting a little too hot for his liking, and begins to pack up shop. I sell the Gun Aficionado-detective a sniper bundle and get myself a space suit for the trip back. I plant a Syndie bomb in the shop when the engineer from before comes back.
"What are you doing?"
"C-cl-e-ea-ra-nce-e s-sa-le"
With my literal sack of money slung over one shoulder, I announce to the crew that I'm packing up and that after the initial detonation any surviving merchandise is up for grabs. Hilariously, c4 acts like grenades when their storage container is on fire, so when the dust settled from the FIRST blast, the crew immediately ran into the wreckage only to score me an unintended triple kill as the c4 went off.
At this point, I've been messaging the AI, intending to hand deliver an upgrade. With all the mercenaries running around, the remaining command staff confiscated the combat upgrade, not trusting the AI with it. Feels n some
Pity for the abused and forgotten AI, I arrive in front of his core and let them know that the upgrade is a special edition variant and traitorize him on the spot before evacuating myself.
Now, where mine and owegeno's events conflicted, is that the three people who died in my shops post-blast, where also the most well equipped, access orientated crew. So when his mercenaries boarded the station, they had almost no opposition outside of a crotchety AI. The conflict between crew, AI, and mercenaries reaches a point that a shuttle is called. At some point the tesla is released (???) killing the AI, and I opt to bring the curtain call by activating the nuke, timing it to go off a couple minutes after it docks (leaving room for either the mercenaries or the two emags I sold to be used to safely escape. During all this, an enterprising atmos tech is preparing a plasma flood to kill off the murderous mercenaries.
Admin Log: MimicFaux has played BurningInSpess.ogg
The shootouts and the saxxing about the station moves with the song, and the battle for increasingly ruined station pitches and tosses, and as the song winds down to a close the nuke goes off and the actors take a bow. The reactions to the event are mixed but overall highly positive outside of a few salty nuts. Who rightly so, complained their was a lack of cohesion between mine and owegeno's events and that the mercs were a little too well geared for a crew at 2am.
Overall though everyone had fun, and look forward to the next time they have get to exploring maint to see where the nervous trader sets up next!
